


Sleepless Nights, Lonely Hours

by Dino_Cattivo



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: BAMF Jesse McCree, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dragons, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Loneliness, M/M, McHanzo - Freeform, Noodle Dragons, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Parent Reaper | Gabriel Reyes, Touch-Starved, lonely jesse mccree, parent reaper
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:01:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27673070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dino_Cattivo/pseuds/Dino_Cattivo
Summary: Jesse wants to drown his loneliness in alcohol and finally have a good night's sleep. The gigantic lizard-like thing appearing makes this rather difficult.
Relationships: Genji Shimada/Tekhartha Zenyatta, Jesse McCree/Hanzo Shimada
Comments: 80
Kudos: 207





	1. Night 1

**Author's Note:**

> Seeing as I can't find the motivation to work on one of my bigger projects and recently fell into the McHanzo hell I'm starting this to get back into the flow of writing. This will mostly be short chapters that I will write and post as inspiration strikes me. Tags will be upteded when I see where the story takes me. I still hope you finde reading this enjoyable.

It took some tries but Jesse shouldered the heavy maintenance hatch open without falling down the small ladder and climbed through breathing in the fresh sea breeze. He walked over to the edge of the small platform of the communication tower gazing at the setting sun over the ocean. 

  


The view wasn’t as enchanting as from the scaffold of the rocket - and wasn’t that astonishing, having a real although nonfunctioning rocket just standing in their backyard. He had climbed up there once or twice after answering the recall but lately he preferred sitting on top of the communication tower. It was still secluded enough that no one would stumble over him, and high enough to still have a splendid view down the cliff site but easier to reach than climbing up a thin metal ladder while the wind was blasting. Easier to get down from too while being completely wasted. Jesse much preferred waking up hungover in his bed or next to the toilet and not death, thank you very much.

  


He knew well that getting black out drunk on more nights of the week then not wasn’t an agreeable habit to get into but he just couldn’t help it. A lot had been on his mind since he returned to the Watchpoint. At first he had just been happy to see his old friends again and hopeful that after such a long time wandering around always looking over his shoulder, he would finally have a place again that he could call home and feel safe at.

  


Just like he did at Blackwatch.

  


_ But wasn’t that the problem? _ This not being Blackwatch. So close to it, but still so different that the feeling of wrongness made it impossible to find sleep without the help of alcohol. He missed the old day, but even with many of the old grew here it wasn’t the same. Not since...  _ since Reyes.  _

  


It was laughable how much of a difference a single person could make. He was glad to see all the old faces alive and well, Genji, Reinhard, Torbjorn, Ana, Tracer and heck even the asshole Morrison, but without his boss it wasn’t the same. There was a wall between them preventing Jesse from connecting with them on a deeper level than small talk or exaggerated tales of his journey the past years, always leaving out the hard parts the loneliness and close calls.

  


But it wasn’t just that he had noticed on the past missions that no one took him seriously anymore. At first he had written Hana ignoring his orders and Mei storming in without him up to their age difference and childish rebellion. He had done it often enough when he was still young, although he knew better when to listen to Reyes and when he wouldn’t get him and his entire team killed. Soon though, it became apparent that they only ignored his orders. 

  


And it wasn’t only them. Morrison threatened him like a total beginner and civilian even if he had years of experience under his belt, Genji always checked up on him ready to deflect the enemy fire if the situation got sticky which was sweet but totally unnecessary and Lucio always looked at him with worried big eyes and fussed over him when he got as much as a paper cut which was annoying if you had to drag the idiot out of the line of fire he had carelessly stormed into, to get to Jesse sooner. 

  


So yes, he was damn pissed they took him for a complete tool when he survived Blackwatch and so many years on his own just fine. Especially when no one had given a crab about him when the first person put a bounty on his head - this didn’t apply to the kids; they didn’t know him back then.

  


Instead, he was angry at himself for letting it get to this point with the stupid way he behaved.

  


Play up the idiot act, let them think you are weaker than you are, lower their guards, stay safe. Reyes' teaching was still present in his mind, the only thing keeping him alive over the past years. And now that he was here, his subconscious had a hard time catching up with the fact that he was truly safe and no one would stand next to his bed in the middle of the night to put a bullet in his skull. So he played his part, the aloft happy cowboy, always friendly, always forgiving. 

  


In the beginning he had thought this would help him fit in as he seemed more approachable but his plan backfired and now he was an unreliable fool everyone was friendly with but avoided for avoided a deeper connection with.

  


The people not affected by this were Hanzo, who had shown up with Genji giving Jesse a near heart attack in the process and Genji’s teacher Zenyatta, although for very different reasons. Hanzo hated Jesse since his first Howdy as he ignored Jesse’s outstretched hand and stormed off. Since then he worked with Jesse if he had to, but always glaring at the cowboy and never willing to help if not especially told.  _ Wasn’t it sad he enjoyed this mission the most because he had a competent partner who followed the plan and just left Jesse to get his part done?  _ Or die in the progress with how he huffed every time Jesse returned to the meeting point. But annoying the man was fun so Jesse let it slide. 

  


Zenyatta was just always friendly and kind. Maybe it was because he was an omnic, but prejudice didn’t affect him at all. Jesse didn’t always get what he was talking about, but he still enjoyed listening to the teachings as it filled the silence.

  


Too bad Zenyatta and Genji were off for a long mission involving an omnic smuggling ring. He missed the friendly pats on the back and Genjis hugs. Genji gave the best hugs (even if there wasn’t any competition, Jesse’s point still stood). 

  


So he had resolved to drink the night away till the two were back and he could feel less lonely. As desperate as he was bothering Hanzo seemed like a great plan, but he had gotten a strict ban from doing so by Mercy as she put cream on the forming brush on his chin from the other man's fist. His argument that their dispute hadn’t been too bad seeing as the other man aimed for his chin and not his nose hadn't softened her resolve. 

  


Suddenly, his musing was interrupted as he caught a movement in the corner of his eyes and he rolled to his feet, pushing over his precious bottle of Whisky, ready to face the enemy blocking the way down.

  


Holy shit, that’s a lizard.

  


**HOLY SHIT!** A GIANT LIZARD!

  


In his panic to get some space between himself and the enormous creature he nearly fell off the edge in his backward stumbling, and it was only thanks to his quick reflexes that he directed his momentum sideways and rolled along the edge. Now he was literally in a corner with no way left to go less of all forward so he glanced down trying to determine if he could climb downward the smooth surface without slipping, very unlikely, or if he would survive the jump down if he used the ledge below as some form of slide. 

  


He was no coward and no stranger to lizards and snakes as he had spent a good portion of his life in the desert, but this creature was terrifying and Jesse had never seen something remotely close to it before. It was as big as a car, maybe even bigger- kinda hard to make out as it was slim and winding long like a snake, glowing blue against the night sky. Its scales were glistening and there was a mane from the top of its massive head to the end of its dangerously, slashing tail. The horns on his head reminded him of a tree branch or the antlers of a deer, sharp and perfect to stab, that they were pointed backwards and not directly at him didn’t ease Jesse’s worry. But the most terrifying thing about this creature was its sharp deathly claws and teeth bared at him in a growl. This was a predator ready to rip its prey in half and lick the skin from its bones with its long tongue. And now it had caught Jesse.

  


He shouldn't have left his communicator in his room in hope of a few interrupted hours of drinking. He could scream but in a base this spacious it was unlikely someone would hear and it would only aggravate the creature more. 

  


Jesse Mccree, survivor of Deadlock, vice captain of Blackwatch and well-known outlaw slayed by a lizard. He would laugh if he wasn’t so terrified. Maybe jumping would be the better option. It would be quicker, painless. Just a few seconds of freefall and an instance of agony before he was gone.  _ Yep, definitely better than slowly being eaten alive by this thing. _

  


He eased his hand backwards till he found the edge, his muscles tensing for the move when he felt warm breath on his fingers. 

  


His head spun around giving him a nick in the neck he would feel tomorrow as if he would make it till then. He was faced with a big skull and intelligent eyes blinking at him and another row of teeth as the creature opened its maw to breathe in deep and catch his scent.

  


**“FUCK ME SIDEWAYS”**

  


THERE WAS ANOTHER LIZARD. 


	2. Night 1b

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caught between two beast Jesse has nowhere left to run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried. Interactions between Jesse and the team are hard.

Well, it seems like Jesse's grandiose plan of jumping was void with the second beast's appearance. So now the big question was which of them would get the great honor of eating him.  _ Or perhaps they would share? _ Not that he would be more than a small snack for such gigantic monsters, anyway. 

Apparently the one climbing up the side of the building was the lucky one as it made it its way up to the platform nimble as a cat, forcing Jesse back into the middle of the roof with the colossal head that keeps nudging him. Further and further back he went till his back collided against a warm body. A shiver ran down his spine confronted with the deep growl behind him, the sheer terror routing him to the spot staring at the other beast drawing nearer and nearer.

People saying you saw your life flash by in the last moments before death were  **fat liars** . The only thing Jesse saw was big teeth drawing close and the nagging question of whether Genji would keep his promise and dispose of the magazines hidden under the bed before the girls could find them. 

To his utter surprise there was no pain, no tearing of flesh or smell of blood as the lizard pressed his snout against Jesse’s chest. Just a constant huffing as it sniffed him and then a deep rumbling followed by constant nudging and rubbing. Like a cat. 

You see, Jesse wouldn’t say he was dumb or extremely reckless, he wouldn’t have survived so long otherwise, but he was utterly drunk, tired and had at least two mini heart attacks in the past minutes. So it made perfect sense to him to reach out and start petting the gigantic man-eating lizard thing.

The first thing he noticed was how warm it was. The night was not extremely cold, but the heat still felt nice against Jesse’s chilly fingers. Now that he thought about it, the beast at his back was just as warm and he leaned more against it to sook up the heat throughout the thin shirt he usually wore to bed. 

As The creature didn’t seem keen on biting off the offending fingers and just turned into the touch, Jesse started petting it. The scales might look sharp as nails on the edge, but they were surprisingly soft under his fingers.  _ This was actually very nice _ .  _ Relaxing _ . Like petting an animal. A huge one. 

He sunk down to the floor and made himself comfortable leaning against the other lizard which seemed fine with playing backrest, and to his delight the head he had just petted followed him down and rested on his thighs. He started scratching the scales around the base of the horns, and the rumbling increased in volume in something Jesse guessed was this beast's attempt at a purr. It was frankly very adorable.  _ Who would have thought this were basically gigantic cuddly cats?  _

He reached back with his free hand and petted the monster behind him til it brought out in the same purr-rumbling.

It vibrated throughout Jesse's body. It felt great like a massage and he could feel his body relaxed as the adrenaline and panic drained from his bones and he sank back in a pleasantly buzzed state. It was very nice. He felt his eyes grow heavy and closed them just relaxing and basking in the utter bliss.

This was good. Here warm and content, petting and cuddling. He liked it. Hadn’t felt so good in a long time. Maybe he should buy himself an animal. Perhaps he could bother Angela till she allowed him a cat or maybe something smaller, less troublesome, like a rabbit for his sleep problems. He would like that. Having something waiting in his room to get home and cuddle. Too bad the lizards wouldn’t fit through his door. Or were small enough to hide from the team, as Morrison would probably forbid animals on base. He was a party popper like that. Gabe would have been way cooler about it.

~*~

The next morning he woke thanks to the bright sun shining directly on his face, stabbing his hungover brain. But despite the displeasure of the expected hungover and the truly awkward position he had slept in on the hard roof, he felt better than he had all week.

He was well rested and relaxed. His sleep was pleasingly dreamless and therefore without nightmares. He didn’t know what he did to deserve this, but he was grateful and felt prepared to face the day and the rest of his team.

He wished he could spend more nights like this, but he doubted the lizards would appear again - or maybe they would as they were a fraction of Jesse’s own imagination.  _ Could you influence your own drunk delusions? _

He could ask Angela the next time she dragged him in her office to bother him about his insomnia, only to describe some sleeping pills that didn’t make his sleep any more restful and only trapped him in nightmares, unable to wake up.  _ Or maybe not. _ Now that he thought about it telling the team physician that two blue monsters had cuddled you to sleep wasn’t the best idea. The revelation that he had drunk enough whiskey to hallucinate in a high and therefore dangerous place would repulse her. He didn’t want the lecture nor the ensured ban of alcohol.

So staying quiet it was. He was really damn good at the secrecy game. Keeping secrets from colleges, from friends and family. No one ever suspected anything.

And they weren’t any the wiser about his nightly activities when he stepped freshly showered into the noisy mess hall for breakfast. 

He took the free seat next to Hanzo as it was closest to the kitchen and he couldn’t bother to carry his coffee, his love, his salvation, any further will the loud chattering killed his head. 

“Howdy partner,” his cheerful greeting got promptly ignored; as usual. He wondered why he even continued to bother at this point. But it was just polite and he would be damned before he gave up and admitted defeat faced with the stone wall, which was Hanzo Shimada. One day he would get a nod or some other form of acknowledgement from the bastard. And then he would smack it right back in the bastard’s face.

Hanzo pushed his chair back abruptly, took his half finished bowl of rice and strode away, leaving Jesse behind to scowl at his back. 

**_Fuck you too_ ** _ , you highness. It wasn’t like I enjoy being in your company either.  _

If it weren’t for Genji and his plea to cut his brother some slack on his journey to redemption, Jesse would have already started a fistfight with Hanzo, and this time he wouldn’t play fair but use every dirty little trick in the book to win. Stuck up fuckers with more pride than anything, never knew how to deal with that. 

**Damn It.** _Why was he so gullible for his best friend's pouty face? Why could Genji even make a pouty face?_ He wore a face plate most of the time. Jesse shouldn’t be able to detect his pouty face at all. 

“...-cree,” his head snapped up, his complete attention captured by the mentioning of his name.

“- will provide support on the flank and create an opening which Agent Zhou will use to freeze the opponent to give the rest of us a chance to slip by.”

_ Wow _ , leave it to Winston to come up with a good plan. He really should give the big guy more credits. Maybe even a jar of peanut butter. Looks like Jesse would finally get some action.

“Are you sure that is the only option? That sounds really dangerous,”  _ damn don’t mess this up for me Lucio. _

“A tank would be better suited for this,”  _ really Mister captain I storm off without my team. Suddenly you need a tank for this?  _

“I will do it,”  _ and here it came. Hana Song snatching his job once more. Fantastic. _

_ Remember, as he said he was ready to face the day?  _ Well, he had lied. He wasn’t ready. In fact, he didn’t want to be awake and part of this conversation anymore.  _ Couldn’t he just go back to cuddle with his new imaginative friends? _


	3. Night 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even a good nights sleep doesn't make the day any better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope the names fit. I try to come up with something Jesse would think about.

To everyone's surprise except Jesses the mission had been a total shitshow.  _ But who could have expected that having your entire plan ride on the shoulders of an immature kid, unable to follow any form of order would go wrong?  _

Apparently none of Overwatch's finest strategists and leaders.  _ And who had been caught up in the crossfire as he tried to salvage the mission and get everyone out alive? _ None other than Jesse.

It had all gone wrong when D.Va, instead of sticking to the plan charged right in because apparently her  _ ‘mecha didn’t have enough stealth points _ ’. This left Mei in no position to freeze the enemy without getting shot and therefore the path for the rest of the team closed which now had to fight their way through. 

In the ensuing shuffle Jesse had to play backup for everyone because their team wasn’t in sync and their defense full of holes. The highlight of this clusterfuck was him jumping in front of Mei and dragging her to the ground when D.Va charged and left her alone under enemy fire. He got a pretty nasty bullet grace for his trouble and chewed out by Lucio until he lost his temper and screamed at the poor kid that next time he would just let Talon kill their fucking Teammate and the whole crew could whip their own asses if they fucked up next time because he had enough. 

The ensuing silent and shocked faces had made an ugly satisfaction curl in Jesse’s stomach.  _ Serves them right for threatening him like a total fool. _

Now a few hours later and back on base, he felt bad for losing his temper like that. Lucio was a good kid, only worried about him and scared of the blood gushing from his arm. He didn’t deserve Jesse’s anger. But his situation had been stressful and added to how bad the past days had been he couldn’t hold back his temper.

He would have to apologize tomorrow and make it up to the boy somehow. He liked music so maybe he would ask Athena to queue up some songs that were to the Dj’s taste and chill on the sofa with some snacks.

For now, though he was exhausted, his arm hurt and he just wanted to sleep. Not that he had much hope in that department, so another night on the roof it was. 

He secretly hoped his companions from last night would appear again, but he didn’t have much hope.  _ Delusions were like dreams, right? You rarely had the same one twice? _ At least he guessed it was that way. And even if that wasn’t the case, he wouldn’t get black out drunk two days in a row. He didn’t hate his liver that much. But a few shots to calm him while looking at the stars sounded nice.

He sat at the roof again and this time he had brought his communicator and after coming up with a short playlist for Lucio with Athena's help (she was an absolute angel) he busied himself with watching one of his favorite old western. He knew it by heart at this point, and it had become a comfort after hard days.

At the halfway mark of the movie as he got a light buzz going and debated going to bed and at least try to get some sleep, they came back.  **His lizards were back** . Nibley they climbed over the edge, snorting and rumbling in greeting. They quickly fell into hectic pushing with their big snouts and sniffing of his clothes, clearly agitated. It confused Jesse, but he held still and let them do as they pleased. 

But he couldn’t hold back the flinch and sharp intake of breath as one of them pushed against his injured arm. 

Their reaction was explosive. One of them growled deeply and puffed up like a cat, all the scales standing up showing the razor-sharp edges as it circled around Jesse, tail slashing dangerously close but never outright hitting him. The other whined pitifully, fell onto its stomach and made himself small, or as small as such a creature could.

It was endearing how protective and worried these two were for his safety.

“Aww guys, it’s okay. I’m fine. It’s just a scratch a few days and it will be as good as new. No more worry, just come here and give me some good lizard cuddles.”

The one previously on the floor darted forward and pressed its head against Jesse’s middle, waiting expectantly to be scratched. The other one made another round checking over the edge, guarding them Jesse marveled before curling its massive body around Jesse and the other beast. It’s tail winding around Jesse’s chest in a possessive gesture.

The whole thing was kinda cute and Jesse couldn’t help but take a few photos with his communicator only to realize that it would just show him alone giggling like a maniac as the lizards weren’t real.  _ Whatever.  _ He was too happy to care. He would delete them tomorrow.

“Mhh, you two need names. I can’t keep calling you Lizard 1 and lizard 2 in my head. How could I name you? The dog on our farm was named Buddy, but even if you are excellent buddies, it doesn’t fit that well. You look way too badass for the typical animal names. So proper names...I got it. You are,” he pointed at the cuddly beast in his lab, “Eastwood after the great Clint Eastwood. Which makes you,” he patted the tail of the protective one, “Wayne after John Wayne.”

He looked at them with pride, astonished how good his naming sense was, desperately hoping they would accept them. To his utter delight, they just huffed and accepted the names. Well, they were his hallucinations after all, so they must have exquisite taste. 

“I hope you like westerns because oh boy you are in for a treat.”

He clicked through the library on his communicator till he found The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly.  _ Never could go wrong with a classic like this _ . He angled the screen so he and his new friends could watch and settled for a long night. He barely made it through the opening scene.

~*~

Waking up on the roof was becoming a habit. He should think about carrying his bed up here. It would get a lot more use that way. 

He checked the time on his communicator; the screen lighting up to the black of the video player. He went through his taps looking for the playlist he had made yesterday and got caught by the camera.

He had made photos yesterday while in a slight buzz. Better delete them before someone saw those and made fun of him, or worse took it as an opportunity to criticize.

The first picture in his gallery froze him on the spot. He was going crazy there was no other way. No alcohol in the system to explain what he was seeing. 

Even blinking and turning the device off and on again didn’t change the result. There was still a picture of him smiling stupidly, leaning against a blue mass, a tail around his chest and his hands on the head of Eastwood’s gigantic head.

_ Okay, _ he was officially going crazy. Maybe Angela had been right and not sleeping had harder consequences that he had foreseen and now he had skipped right to a mental breakdown.  **Shit, shit, shit** . He had to ask someone for help to confirm that there were in fact no gigantic lizards in the picture with him. But he couldn’t go up and just ask. That would be weird.

There was only one option. Someone he could trust with his life, privacy and well being.

“Athena, darling, this must stay between us, understood? Not informing Angela or Morrison or anyone else, okay? Just us.”

“I understand Agent Mccree.”

He instantly relaxed as the calm electronic voice came out of his communicator's speakers. You could always count on Athena.

“This picture I have opened, do you see this too, or am I going insane?”

  
“If you refer to the dragons, Agent Mccree. I can assure you that they are visible.”

Dragons.  **DRAGONS.** FUCK THEY WERE DRAGONS.

He hoped they weren’t angry that he thought that they were lizards. But damn, he knew lizards. They existed, he had seen them before. He couldn’t be blamed for thinking they were lizards. Enormous blue ones, but still. No one would see scaley gigantic creatures and instantly think dragons… or they would. Now that he thought about it, it was kinda obvious. His drunk brain just hadn’t been that fast on the uptake. 

“So Athena. A picture… with dragons… hypothetically if this was to send me into a panic what would you suggest I do? Just hypothetically.”

“I would suggest consulting Agent Shimada the older as Agent Shimada the younger is absent. Dragons are deeply rooted into his culture and the dragons you encountered have most resemblance with the image of dragons presented in asien especially Japanese literature.”

And here he thought Athena was an angel when clearly she was the devil in disguise sending him on a quest that was set to fail from the start. But if someone could make the impossible possible and beat the odds it was Jesse Mccrede. And Hanzo freaking Shimada wouldn’t change that.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time hopefully a bit more of Hanzo.


	4. Day 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jesse talks to Hanzo. It goes as well as you would expect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This time with lots of dialogue the bane of my existance.

“Hey Mccree?”

“Jeez kid, Jesse is fine. I shared my top secret stash of snacks with you so that makes us friends. No need for formalities.”

“Gotcha. Just old habits, hard to shake and so on.”

“Tell me about it. I still salute Morrison from time to time by accident and it sucks.”

“I really want to see that. He must make such a stupid face.”

“No idea with the stupid mask he wears all the time. He really needs to get a better sense of fashion.”

“And that coming from you.”

Jesse put a hand over his chest, gaping in mock horror. 

“You  _ hurt me feelings _ , darling.”

This left Lucio breathless as he giggled.

“Oh man,” he gasped whole face red from laughing, “why did nobody tell me you are so funny. Like seriously man, thanks for hanging out with me today. I had a lot of fun and the snacks were delicious. Plus, your taste in music is really fresh dude.”

“Lucio, I must admit something to you.”

Jesse could feel Lucio’s intense stare as he looked down at his hands, all serious, as he tried to hide his smile.

“I asked Athena to help me with the playlist. The stuff I usually listen to is older than you.”

Lucio bursted out into another wave of laughter and patted Jesse on the back. 

“That's more like it. I was already wondering what happened for you to be so cool suddenly.”

“Hey, I will have you know I’m plenty cool, thank you very much. Y’ll just have poor taste.”

The ping of Lucio’s communicator interrupted his rant, and Lucio quickly took it out and answered the message. Once more Jesse was surprised just how fast this young generation could type. He himself took advantage of Athena's voice to text function as often as he could. 

“Hanna?”

“Yeah, she wants me to join her livestream.”

“Well, of you go then. Wouldn't want to keep a lady waiting.”

“Don’t let her hear that or you will get punched. But seriously, we should do that again.”

“Absolutely. Ahh, before you go. Any idea where I can find Shimada? Hanzo? Ahh having two people with the same name is confusing.”

Lucio pulled a face as he answered.

“Angela will literally kill you if you start another fight.”

“Okay, first, I did start nothing. It was always a mutual decision. Second of all, no fighting. I just want to know something about Japanese lore and with Genji’s absence, I thought I could ask him. Break the ice, you know. Try to make friends.”

“Well, I wish you best of luck with that then. Angela will be happy to see you make up. I don’t know where he is exactly, but he spends most of his free time in his room or the training area so I would check there.”

“Thanks a bunch and good luck with your stream.”

Following Lucio’s advice, Jesse made his way over to the training range as it was neutral ground, had more than a single entrance and unfeeling targets to let your aggression out on. Just in case. You never knew with the oldest Shimada.

For once luck was shining down on him as he spotted the archer standing in the shooting range firing one arrow after another into the training bots with marvelous precision. It was an impressive show of skills Jesse could appreciate, even if the man himself was a jerk. 

As if he could sense the insult, Hanzo stiffened up, rolled back his shoulders and strode forward to yank out the arrows out of the now motionless training bots with a bit too much force.

"Hey Shimada.  **Wait** "

Hanzo ignored him and kept on walking toward the showers, but Jesse got in between him and the door. He really didn’t want to have this conversation with the other in a state of undress.

“I don’t wanna fight. Seriously. Just I wanted to know something about Japan and Genji is gone, so I thought I could ask you if you are not too busy or something. You know…”

_ Well, going good Jesse. _ That wasn’t awkward at all.  _ Really, how come he always forgot to have a proper conversation if it came to Hanzo? _

The man in question stared at him intently, frowning, and Jesse couldn’t help but fidget nervously.

“Perhaps I could spar a minute or two but make it quick.”

A shiver ran down Jesse’s back as he heard the surprisingly deep and sharp voice for the first time. Till now Hanzo has never deemed him worthy to speak to and mostly ignored him. So it was even more of a surprise in how many fist fights they had gotten. But their non verbal insults and show of repulsion were top-notch.

“So yeah, right. Dragons,” this was already going great shown by the snare of Hanzo face, “I’m serious here, Shimada. I was told you were some sort of expert on them. Like the  **biiig** kind. Car size but long as hell, 4 short legs kinda like a corgi, scales all over, fur from head to tail and fun neon color. Kinda gruesome looking? With a maw full of teeth and claws sharp enough, they could easily cut a human into ribbons and not the f-”

His excessive description got cut off abruptly by a fist to the stomach, toppling him over. 

First there was surprise as his shocked mind tried to catch up with the hell that had just happened. Then came the pain like a train suddenly rolling him over and leaving a mess behind. A throbbing in his gut that spiked into flaring agony. Spreading from the point of impact through his entire body to his tooth. It feels like someone has their hand in his insides and is squeezing his organs. 

Only then he felt blood well into his throat from his tongue he must have bitten.

The edge of his vision was turning dark from the lack of air as Hanzo took his sweet time before he removed his fist from Jesse’s cut. But he didn’t fall far.

Hanzo had Jesse’s collar in his fist holding him up as his legs had grown weak, pulling his face close and hissing at his face.

**“よくもまあ”**

Jesse did not understand what he was saying, only that he was absolutely furious, snarling and growling, and Jesse had no idea what he had done wrong. He had never seen the man lose it like this, not even when he poked and taunted.

**“しんじまえ”**

_ Wow,  _ his arm is really impressive, all the muscles. And showing it off like that with his traditional clothing.

His head snapped to the side as the fist collided with his cheek. The following cough was wet. Sparks of red on Hanzo’s hand. 

Arm drawing back again.

He spat.

Red spit dropping down Hanzo’s face. 

Loud screams in the distance. 

Darkness 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I completely forgot to include the translation of the Japanese. It is "How dare you" and "Drop death".   
> Sorry for the inconvenience.
> 
> Still open for comments and critic.


	5. Night 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fallout of the fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry. It just turned into suffering.

Awareness greeted him with a dull throbbing in his guts, deep and hot and he stiffened up in a panicked haze. He had to defend himself against whoever was inflicting this pain.

A mistake as the movement drove a spike of pain through his middle and drove the air from his lungs in a high-pitched wince. The only thing he could do was press his eyes shut against the tears to keep at least a slice of dignity and hold still, breathe slow and shallow until the worst of the pain had passed and the agony dwindled down to a throbbing again.

Thank  **fuck** for painkillers.

More awake now it was obvious that he was in the med bay and on the good stuff that made him a bit woozy and tired but at least not high as a kite.

“Ahh cowboy, finally awake?”

“Lu-,” he got interrupted by a coughing fit. Either Hanzo’s grip on his collar had been a lot harder than he thought or there was still some of his blood stuck in his throat.

“Sorry. Here you go.”

Jesse dutifully took the offered straw between his lips and took slow measured sips. He knew better at this age than to rush and make things worse in the process by either choking or making himself sick. 

“Wa-... What happened?”

“You and Hanzo fought again. Or more like an ‘one sided annihilation’. You were in a bad way. Nothing broken but half of your face is purple, your tongue only stopped bleeding after Mercy used her Nanites, and your stomach is brushed to hell so good luck moving for the next week. Lucky for you Morrison passed by when he did and got in between you two or it could have been a lot worse. What happened to just talk and make friends?”

“ **Heck** , if I know what was wrong with the maniac. I tell you _he is crazy._ _A complete lunatic_.”

“You are a bit unfair, aren’t you?”

“ **No!** Maybe? I’m just pissed is all.”

  
“Yeah, I can totally understand that but you know there are always two involved in a fight? So what did you do to piss him off?”

“ **Nothing I swear!** How was I supposed to know that asking him about dragons would agro him? I was just curious about japanese dragons and thought I would ask the japanese man.”

“That's all?”

“Yeah.”

“That's really strange.”

“You don’t say.”

“I will ask the rest of the team about it. Morrison is monitoring Hanzo until this whole thing is cleared up, so the faster we sort this out the better. And Jesse, Mercy will kill you if you get up and disturb her Nanite therapy.”

_ “Yes, mom _ .”

“Don’t sass me,” he patted Jesse’s leg on his way to the door.

“I’m glad that you are okay.”

“Thanks, Lucio.”

Well, looks like he had a few hours to kill till Mercy would take mercy on him (haha) and let him go. So he passed his time playing with his communicator, which someone had played on his nightstand, napping and bothering Athena to google Japanese dragon lore for him. It wasn’t so helpful as the dragons in the stories were never friendly or cuddly but used their superior power to dominate their opponents or got killed. Far from Wayne and Eastwood, but at least the pictures Athena showed him were damn accurate. 

Still, it got boring really quickly, and he contemplated bothering Fareeha with messages until she came over. Luckily for her, there was a knock on the door.

“Yeah.”

His mood plummeted when the door slid open and revealed Hanzo Shimada, the bastard himself standing in his door looking kind of sheepish. Or as sheepish as his resting bitchface could look.

“Hello Agent Mccree. Can I come in?”

Saying no and telling Athena to close the door in the shithead's face was tempting, but he resisted. He wanted an explanation for what happened and Lucio was right, it was very unlikely for the other man to explode like that.

“Not like I could stop you,” Jesse said and gestured down to his immobilized position.

The guilty flicker on Hanzo’s face replaced the now very dull ache with satisfaction. It served the bastard right. Still having the conversation like this was awkward, so Jesse gestured to the chair next to the hospital bed and Hanzo sat down.

"I was informed that my action  **may** have been hasty,” A snort from Jesse, “and that I overreacted. Lucio explained to me that your interest in the subject was purely born out of curiosity and held no malicious intent.”

_ Wow, what skills. Apologizing without really saying sorry. Prideful much? _

Dragons and their... _ brutality _ ,” here Hanzo broke off, avoiding eye contact with Jesse and focusing on the bedside table instead. His fingers, which usually were so calm and controlled, kneading each other nervously. Whatever he was about to reveal now was something not easily spoken of. It made Jesse very curious as he had tried to figure the other out from the first time they met. Perhaps this would be the key to finally get along with the archer.

“I don’t want to speak about them,” Jesse sacked together in disappointment. W _ hat had he thought? That they would have a heart to heart and be all buddy-buddy afterward? How stupid. _ Hanzo was and would always be a total prick.

“But seeing as you are stupidly curious, I would be willing to share some insights on some other Japanese folklore and introduce you to the culture.”

"Yeah, no thank you, I'm done. I’m done with you and your stupid, lone wolf act. I have tried long enough to be civil, to even to make friends with you, for Genji’s sake, because he is genuinely a good person and therefore probably not related to you, but I’m done.”

Jesse glared at Hanzo’s surprised face. Should he whine to Genji about Jesse’s harsh words. He could even try to hit Jesse again. It wouldn’t stop Jesse from spitting the fucking truth right in his face.

“From the first time we met you have shown me nothing but rudeness and ignorance and I can’t stand it anymore. From now on let’s go our separate way Shimada. Don’t speak to me, don’t talk to me. Best don’t even breath the same air as me. Why don’t you do us all a big favor and just leave Overwatch? No one wants you here, not even Genji. He is just too nice to say it.”

Jesse couldn’t stop himself from jabbing his finger against Hanzo’s chest and Hanzo let him, just staring wide-eyed.

“On missions,  **IF** we are ever placed on a mission together, you will follow the plan, no com, no interacting, no peeking at what the stupid cowboy is doing,  _ capiche? _ And please at least try to hide your disappointment if I return to the extraction point alive and well from now on. I have a gun which is significantly faster than your stupid arrows and in the future I will shot first and ask questions never.”

“I ne-”

“ **SHUT UP! What did I just say about not talking to me, jerk? Don’t you speak English? Or are you just so fucking stupid?** ”

This made the others' mouths snap shut instantly. Small mercies, Jesse guessed.

“I should just have waited for Genji to come back and ask him about it. Don’t even know what got me into the retarded idea of asking a man who slaughtered his own brother in cold blood. That is what you get for trying to socialise. But some people are just so rotten there is no saving them and no amount of second chances is enough.”

And with that finally said Jesse couldn’t stand to be in the others’ presence for one moment longer or he would throw up in disgust. He hoped Mercy would understand as he took the biotic field from his stomach and placed it on the nightstand. He staggered as he got to his feet but made up for the strength with pure determination.

He was by the door, when he heard a sharp intake of breath behind him and then a soft, “I did never mean to unleash the dragons against Genji.”

“Sucks to be you then.”

And with this, Jesse was off.

  
  


~*~

  
  


“Can you believe what an asshole he is?”

He got an agreeing huff in return and a careful lick over his face, which made him smile despite the sore subject he was talking about. Ahh, Eastwood was the best and deserved all the pets Jesse could give him. Wayne too of course. But the other dragon was too agitated to cuddle right now as he was snarling down the tower accurately in the direction of the living quarters where Hanzo had to be. 

“Aww, no, darling. You don’t have to do that for me. He might be an ass, but he is not worth your rage. You shouldn’t dirty your beautiful paws with his blood.”

This got him a whine, but the dragon settled down at least somewhat no longer looking ready to pounce down any second and hunt his prey but still growling and kneading the roof under him, the claws leaving deep marcs in the metal. 

“I’m really glad I have you two. No one else would listen to me like this. Or be all ready to unleash their anger on my behalf. So thank you.” 

Hanzo could go fuck himself. Jesse was perfectly fine with staying here, with his overprotective dragons, and never see the guy again. Which would also be better for Hanzo. It looked like Wayne would rip his Hanzo’s head off if the man ever got as close as breathing range. And even if Eastwood didn’t openly growl the way he clung to Jesse, curling as much of his boy around him as he could, showed he would be just as vigorous if Hazo ever harmed Jesse again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hit me for hurting Hanzo.


	6. Day 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guild is a great motivator to ment relationships.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has been some time since thelast update but I somehow missed my chance to make a cut and the chapter just grew longer so enjoy this extra long chapter and please excuse all the angst it just happened.

The past week of Jesse’s life had been good as he recovered from Hanzo’s assault. While he could not take part in missions and had to visit Angela regularly for check-ups he felt content for the first time since coming back to Overwatch.

Perhaps even since fleeing Blackwatch and being on the run.

He had taken to hanging out with Lucio more often than not as the young man sought out Jesse’s company to check on his recovery and to Jesse’s big surprise seemed genuinely delighted to spend time together, constantly laughing at the stupid jokes people usual only cringe at. Even if Jesse understood little about music, he could appreciate the effort Lucio put into mixing up playlists for them to listen to while hanging out, always improving it to Jesse's taste.

When Hana picked up on their new habit, she had first tried to rob Jesse into joining their stream but he had declined wanting to keep his whereabouts and involvement with Overwatch a secret. It wouldn’t do their cause any good if police, bounty hunters or scum from his past started knocking on their door. But even if he didn’t appear on the screen himself he had taken to relax just out of frame and gave occasional commentary if he felt like it. Though more often than not he just napped, letting their animated voices and Lucio’s music lull him to sleep knowing he was safe.

It was really nice.

But that wasn’t the only thing that had changed.

After the incident Morrison had paid more attention to Jesse, thinking that he could not protect himself even on base which pissed Jesse off to no end. This anger combined with the boredom every time he was left alone  _ ‘to give him time to recover _ ’ led to him making bad decisions. Mainly giving into the childish desire of playing a little prank on the man as pay back.

Which sounded fun and dandy at first but turned downhill fast if you were an ex-agent of a secret undercover op division. Back in the good old days, Blackwatch had the little tradition for the first of April, courtesy of one Gabriel Reyes. He called it a little exercise to lighten the mood but it genuinely frightened people from Overwatch. The rules were simple: Come up with a prank, alone, in a group or however you wished and execute said plan. If you got caught or the idea was too insignificant you lost. No one wanted to lose. The special training regiment given as punishment was literal hell. So all of Blackwatch was on top of their game trying to one up another. 

Everyone was fair game but the agents of Overwatch just made for easier targets than trying to get the upper hand on a follow Blackwatch agent, hence why Overwatch was terrified of the day and many tried to get the day off or called in sick.

Jesse had always enjoyed the day. Even if he had sprouted up now that he was fed regularly he was still as sneaky as when he had been a scrawny teenager. The extra training under Gabe and the fact that he had no hesitation to hit below the belt with his pranks also didn’t hurt. In fact, he had been so good that he made one years’ worth of recruits quit and flee the Watchpoint. They believed the Strike Commander himself and all other chief officers were a new kind of omnic in disguise, which had replaced the originals after killing them in the war. One of them had even pissed himself and begged for his life as Morrison casually asked him if he was lost in the hall. To no one's surprise the entire event had been banned ever since and Jesse had been the unchallenged king of pranks.

Now it was time to dust off his crown and show Morrison what he could do and why no one should mess with him.

The prank was simple but effective. Sneak into Morrisons private quarters, the office he used and move everything an inch to the side. It might not seem like much and rather pointless but the human was a creature of habit. It knows the order of things after getting used to them for a while and even the slightest difference could throw the balance off. 

Like let’s say a bed being a bit closer to the door than it was supposed to be.

Which was why Morrison stumbled straight into the doorframe as he left his room the next morning, swearing up a storm on his way to the kitchen assuming he just needed some coffee to wake up. But it keeps happening during the day. He reached for something but his fingers hit the air. He stumbled where the floor was straight and he kept clipping desks and chairs. 

Okay, maybe Jesse had overdone it when he had added weights into Morrisons clothes to throw off his balance further even if the man wasn’t in his private space. But Jesse had wanted to avoid the chance of Morrison figuring it out. He wasn’t stupid and limiting the effect to certain areas was a big clue. 

The man had been a dick and deserved whatever Jesse threw at him. There was no mission planned so Jesse saw no actual harm in letting the man stumble around for a bit, cursing as he stumped his toe and made a fool out of himself.

Or at least he didn’t until he visited Angela for his daily check up and walked into a distraught and panicking Morrison having a breakdown in the med bay.

“YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. IT DOESN’T GET BETTER. IT HAS BEEN DAYS.  **DAYS ANGY.** W-what if....what...it happened back in S.e.p. too. The chemicals...Angy what if...if it is back? My body...is it breaking down? Am I dying? P-please Angy...tell me! I wanna know if I...I need to get things in order if…”

“Shh, Jack it’s okay, you're not dying. My scan indicates nothing wrong with you and your bloodwork was fine. You are not dying, you hear me.”

“Then your scans are  **wrong** . You missed something. Anything. It isn’t right.”

“Maybe you are just overworked you pushed yourself really hard with planning the last missions and trying to get funds for us, maybe a break would-”

“I KNOW EXHAUSTION. I LIVED IT FOR YEARS AS STRIKE COMMANDER. THIS ISN’T IT. I’m falling apart. Angy I-I...I don’t want to die. I’m not ready. Gabe he.. he is still. I can’t leave him. Not before I tried. I just can’t”

There was an ugly twist in Jesse's stomach.  _ Hello guilt, my old friend _ . He had never intended for it to go this far. The prank had been meant to mess with Jack, sure, but not to that extent. He never intended to hurt the man besides his ego and some brushes. 

“Ahem,” he knocked the wall next to him with his metal arm to get the attention of the room. 

“ **Jesse** , damn, what are you doing here? Wait. Is it already time for your checkup?  **Scheiße** (shit). Not a good time please leave.”

“But Angela I-”

“LEAVE.”

She speed walked over to him and tried to push him out of the door before he could look at Morrison’s face, but he had already seen the tears even if the old soldier quickly rubbed them away.

“I’m sorry.”   
  


“Just go.”

“IT’S MY FAULT!”

“What?”

“I’m responsible for Morrisons condition.”

He suddenly found himself against the wall and a very angry swish woman snarling at him.

  
“ **What did you do?!** And I swear to god Jesse Mccree I will skin you alive if-”

“Woah, there,” Jesse held up his hand in a hopeful pacifying gesture. “I just moved his stuff. And added some weights to his clothes. That’s all. I swear on Bessy.”

Everyone knew that it was serious if he swore on Bessy. He loved the damn hat more than his own family, or at least that was what Ana had always said when she teased him. 

A shocked pause.   
  
“You moved my stuff? But… That shouldn’t do something like that.”   
  


“I might have... moved  **all** of your stuff?”

“All of it?”

“Yes.”

“But that’s...the weights I should have gotten used to them.”

“Kept changing them.”

Another moment of silence.

“You changed them,” Jesse nodded. No use denying it now. 

“Let me get this straight. You snuck into my room, and office-”

“And looker and the top left drawer in the kitchen that no one uses because it only holds stale granola bullshit but you secretly stash your favorite treat behind, and the third lane on the shooting range you favor and the toolbox you keep for your rifle.” 

Okay, maybe he had overdone it a bit. It had been a long time since he had done a prank, and it had been fun to sneak around again and test his skills against some of the best agents in the world. 

“So you broke into all of this and moved my things with no soul noticing a single thing, and then you kept coming back into my room while I slept and kept changing up the weight you hid inside my clothing.”

“Pretty much yes,” Jesse rubbed his neck embarrassingly. Not meeting the shocking and disbelieving gazes of the other two.

“Why would you do something like that? Do you hate me that much for what happened with Gabe? For driving him away and surviving while he… changed?”

“What. No,  **NO** . Hold it right there. You and Gabe were both at fault for having your heads up your own asses. And I don’t hate you. Never did, not even while your quarrel with Gabe. You just piss me off, treat me like a child. An unreliability. I just wanted some payback. To annoy you. I never meant for something like this to happen. It was just a simple prank.”

“A prank? This is hardly a prank, Mccree. Do you even know what you did,” Angela laid in him with renewed fury.

“A fuck. The yearly Blackwatch prank war.”

“The what,” Angela looked at Jack with confusion but stepped back and gave Jesse some breathing room.

“Blackwatch did this thing on the first of April, where they played pranks. They always got out of hand and I had to put an end to them when an entire group of recruits quit in pure panic. We never caught the person responsible, and there wasn’t a single clue. In all the mess that followed, I completely forgot about it. How could I forget about it?”

“They thought you were an omnic posing as Strike Commander, slowly replacing Overwatch personnel with your comrades.”

“What?”

“It... got out of hand?”

“You were the one responsible?”

“I’m sorry.”

“Wait, wait, how could anyone believe such bullshit,” Angela hissed.

“The same way no one noticed I messed with Morrisons stuff.”

“And how is that?”

“I’m an ex-covered op operator with years of field experiences, ties to the criminal underbelly, a creative mind, and in all the years alone I haven’t forgotten a single thing Reyes taught me. How the fuck do you think i did it.”

“I was an idiot for keeping you on the sidelines, wasn’t I?”

“Yes, you were. I suppose this means we won’t play the Jesse is incapable spiel anymore?”

“No, we won’t. I'm sorry for making you feel inadequate. It is just… you are the only thing left by Reyes”

Jesse bristles at the idea that he could betray them to join his old mentor. If so, he wouldn’t have spent the past years alone on the run, always longing for company but cosy in some Talon headquarter.

“After what happened to Gabe. What I did to him I… I-I didn’t want to be responsible for your downfall too.”

_ Oh. Fuck. _ Jesse had been a total asshole misunderstanding the whole situation and instead of talking like a grown up, he had blown everything out of proportion.

“ **Fuck** . I messed up. I just thought you didn’t take me seriously because I was Blackwatch. It never occurred to me that you thought like this. Fuck. I’m sorry. I don’t think I can make it up to you.”

“Just return everything to how it used to be and we will forget about all of this and start over, okay?”

“You got it, boss.”

Jesse saluted before running out of the Med bay. There was only so much feelings and emotional talk he could handle.

Morrison still was and would always be a jackass, but he had returned to being the jackass Jesse had known and respected in his Blackwatch days. They would never be the best of friends, but damn he had to respect the guy and his intentions. 

The only damper in Jesse’s mood was that Genji had yet to return from his undercover mission, which was taking longer and longer as the dimensions of the smuggling extended their expectations. Paired with the deep roots of corruption in the city, he and Zenyatta had a hard time reaching their goal. So Jesse’s questions about his dragons had to wait.

Not that he minded that much. Yes, he would like to know where the dragons came from and why they loved him so much, but he was also fine with just enjoying the gift, he had been given. Now that he could take naps during the day and not be restless, he spent more of his time showing the dragon's his culture. 

They watched westerns together, old and new even if the old ones were clearly superior, he showed off his Serapes, chaps and hats  _ (he now had a very cute picture of the dragons wearing cowboy hats)  _ and even smuggled a sheepherder’s breakfast up for them to enjoy.

He would really like to roast some bread over a campfire to get the right atmosphere but to his great disappointment the dragons, powerful as they were, couldn't breathe fire. One day when he felt better and was motivated, he would drag some wood up the tower and make a fire himself.

But the best about the past week had been that Hanzo, to Jesse’s surprise, had taken the words to heart and had kept his distance, not only from Jesse but also from the rest of the team. It provided a pleasant atmosphere as the awkward moments stopped where people tried to integrate Hanzo in conversation and make friends only to be brutally shot down. Also, it was significantly easier to breathe without the deathly glares and disappointing frowns which killed every mood. 

The rest of the team had been a bit surprised about the change but accepted it quickly, willing to give Hanzo his solitude if he wished to have some space after his clash with Jesse.

Now everything would have been fine if Jesse hadn’t forgotten to tell the rest of the team, especially Winston, about his and the older Shimada’s agreement to go their separate ways. But without the team knowing about the disaster which was Hanzo visiting Jesse in the Med bay to ‘apologize’ there was no logical reason to keep them separated.

So when Jesse stepped into the conference room for his first mission after being declared healthy by Mercy, he was met with Hanzo who looked just as wide eyed as Jesse.

He didn’t know if this was all just a scheme to get rid of any lingering apprehension between them by the team or if it was simply that they had worked well together in the past and where a solid match up. Either way, the whole situation was troublesome. But Jesse for once wouldn’t be the person throwing a fit. So he sat down, ignored Hanzo and acted like nothing was out of the usual. He would leave it to the Shimada to complain if he could not be professional.

“So, uh, thanks for coming so quickly. This mission is very important so there is no room for mistakes, but I’m sure you two can pull it off.”

Winston's word made something warm flutter in Jesse’s chest. Finally, people started taking him seriously and relying on him. 

“Appreciated. But isn’t every mission always important?”

“Yes, but this one especially. Let me start at the beginning. Few people are aware but back when Jack was still working alone as Soldier 76 he penetrated Grand Mesa, a former Overwatch facility under the protection of Helix Security and stole the prototype of a heavy pulse rifle.”

“Wow, and here I thought I was the biggest troublemaker on base. Looks like the old man is a lot cooler than I gave him credit for.”

Winston rolled his eyes but ignored Jesse’s antics. He knew that all jest wouldn't stop him from doing his job.

“Besides the rifle he also took several datapads hoping to find information on the fall of Overwatch, but nothing came of it as they were mostly brought in by Helix when they took up guard duty. We now have reviewed the data again and concluded that there is a traitor in the ranks of Helix security feeding information to Talon.”

Winston took a break here to really let the words sink in.

“How long?”

“Years.”

“Shit.”

“Yes, so it is really important to keep this on the down-low. It is likely that this leaked intel is also responsible for the incident which gravely injured Agent Fareeha.”

Jesse’s palm smacked the table in fury.

“Wait, you want us to keep quiet about this? If anyone has a right to know about this **it’s her** .”

“I know. And she will know once we have proof of the identity of the person. We can’t risk her going after them and scaring them into hiding.”

“But she will know.”

“Yes, I will personally inform her.”

“I hate hiding stuff from her. She has been lied to by her mother for years. I don’t want to add to that.”

He could feel Hanzo’s eyes on him and bristled in discomfort.

“I understand. The faster the whole thing is over, the better. In order to do this, I need you two to return to Grand Mesa, infiltrate and retrieve data that gives us the traitor’s identity. But it is very important to stay under the radar. No one is allowed to know you are there. Jack break in caused waves and we can’t risk a repeat of such a situation. It is important that there is no proof of you being there, so no engaging in combat. Just in and out. If you get caught, we can’t help you. Once the dropship lands, you are on your own till your safe return. If that is too much of a risk for you, decline. I would just beg you to stay quiet about the whole affair.”

Jesse looked at Hanzo, expecting him to stand up and leave. Jesse knew Fareeha, saw her as a little sister so no way he would let the bastard go that hurt her. But Hanzo had no stakes in this. He didn’t care about the team, besides Genji, and had no reason to put himself at risk. But to his surprise, he stayed seated.

“Thank you,” Winston exhaled,” I didn’t know who to ask if you had declined. We don’t have many people with experience in stealth missions. The best course of action is Agent Mccree going in, he has a background in infiltration and knows the Watchpoint from his days with Blackwatch even if there is additional security now. Agent Shimada will be on lookout and provide backup and assistant from the control room. A dropship will bring you as close as possible, but we can’t risk attention so you will have to travel on motorcycles. Clothes and necessary gear are prepared on the ship. It will take off in an hour. Information about the extra security, layout, and potential routes is prepared for you to look over during the flight. Good luck agents.”

  
  


~*~

  
  


Jesse dropped the datapad on the bench next to him as he had finally memorized everything of importance. He risked a glance over to the older Shimada brother -still reading and leaving Jesse alone- and relaxed. He really missed the option to draw his hat over his eyes to get some shuteye. But neither his usual outfit nor his old Blackwatch outfit was approved for the mission, not that he would still fit in the second as he had gained some weight on the run while unable to keep up a regular training regiment.

Instead, he had a highly functional and boring uniform. Boots without spurs but grip to climb, cargo pants with storage for various tools and utensils same as the utility belt, knee pads, a skin-tight shirt with light chest armor on top, gloves and armguard. To top everything of a multifunction visor which gave him night visions and a display for information.

Everything in black.

No gun, only silent weapons, like knives and electro shockers, not that Jesse wasn’t plenty dangerous with his metal arm alone.

The only comfort was that Hanzo had to leave his bow behind as well as even if it was silent, the arrows were too easily recognizable. It was weird to see the usual so traditionally dressed man in the same outfit as himself. Not a bad look per se, but weird.

Soon they landed and as promised were provided motorbikes to get closer to the destination. Jesse took the lead till he could see the facility in the distance, and they stopped to hide the bikes in some bushes.

“Mic check.”

“I hear you.”

“Roger that.”

Seems like they would be professional. Not that Jesse would trust Shimada to have his back if the situation turned south or would rely on him, but there was no need to be purposely difficult. 

They activated their night vision and sneaked closer, always keeping in the shadows and on the lookout for patrolling guards. When they reached the fence surrounding the facility, Jesse gestures to Hanzo to split up. The man could climb the building easily enough and could get into the control room this way and make sure Jese wasn’t on any camera footage. Not that Jesse had much faith in him doing his job.

Jesse climbed over the fence avoiding the barbed wire, landed silently and jogged over to a cooling unit. He used that to get high enough to make the jump to the ventilation grille.

The collision shocked him, but the small rail didn’t leave any room for finesse. Just as the intel had said, the looking mechanism on the left grille was jammed and it slid open easily enough with a bit of force. 

A sloppy job but worked out well for Jesse as he could easily slit into the claustrophobicly small ventilation shaft. Last time he did this he had been a lot slimmer. But he powered through and made it to the metal grit under the roof where all the ugly essentials were hidden necessary to keep a faculty like this running. He never understood why people took such substantial security risk in order for it to look pretty. Jesse was completely hidden up here in the darkness as the lamps were placed on the underside of the mesh to hide the wires. As long as he was quiet, the guards patrolling under him would never know he was here. And god he could be quiet.

Crouched in the small space, he moved forward slowly so the metal had time to adjust to his weight and didn’t make a sound. He followed this safe passage till it diverged from his path to the server room. He spied through the metal grit making sure the guard passed through and that no one else was following closely before easing open the maintenance hatch and letting his legs through. He kept hanging there one handed as he pulled the hatch as far as he could without squishing his fingers and there was only a small click as it closed the rest of the way when he dropped to the floor. Instantly he rolled to the wall pressing himself against it and moved forward, hunched over.

The night vision got deactivated as this part of the hall was lit well enough. It made him uneasy. If he could see, so could they.

He followed behind the guard up front, always with enough space between them so he wouldn’t be heard but close enough that it was unlikely another would catch up to him from behind. When they turned another corner, he was faced with a security camera. 

Now Shimada should have made it to the control room by now and should be able to wipe the footage, but Jesse didn't trust him so he would rather avoid being recorded when he could. And luckily for him this was one of the original cams, one of the old ones that turned in order to get footage of all three corridors meeting here. So he just had to wait behind a fire extinguisher case for the security guard to vanish through a door to the left and till the camera turned. 

“Go.”

The voice in his ear startled him but jumped out of cover and sprinted forward and around the corner, thankfully without bumping right into the next guard as he slid under the metal staircase and pressed his back into a corner.

“Stay there.”

Jesse really wished he could tell Shimada to shove his advice where the sun didn’t shine or continue on just to spite the man, but he could hear the guard coming down the stairs he was crotched under. 

Damn it felt bad, but the man was helpful and Jesse knew better than to mess up a perfectly good mission by refusing intel out of spite. That didn’t mean he liked the guy. Or trusted his word without double checking. 

“Clear.”

He gritted his teeth but hushed out from under the stair and swung himself over the railing to climb up.

This corridor had a camera as well and just as he debated climbing into some service vents again as it wasn’t moving but monitoring a door he saw its light flicker out. Shimada must have looped it for a few seconds. Enough time for Jesse crotch before the door and starting picking the look and getting in, no one being any wiser as the regular footage blended back in.

He ended up in the former mess hall. The once so cheerful and crowded place being ominously quiet and stripped bare except for two desks and a portable freezer. He made a sprint for the kitchen just as suddenly the door to his left slit open and he threw himself down sliding over the floor and crawled the last meter under the desk. He held his breath as some guards came closer and closer, hoping they wouldn’t sit down and eat something as there was no way they would miss him laying under the table. 

He could hear them talk in some language he didn’t know as their steps threw nearer. One of them laughing, the tell tail clicking a weapon against body armor sending his nerves on edge.

Just go. Just go.  **JUST GO.**

He didn’t want to hurt them. They were good people. They didn’t know about the traitor in their organisation. Just as Jesse himself didn't know about the involvement of Talon in Blackwatch until it was too late and he paid the price. He didn’t want to do this to them.

To his utter relief, they just passed by and continued their round.

“To close.”

“I know,” he hissed as he finally made it to the kitchen and jumped over the serving counter. He made it through the backdoor without running into any more trouble and got closer to the staircase which would lead him down into the server room. 

Usually one would need a keycard to get past the door which would cause a funny game of sticky fingers with unassuming guards but luckily for Jesse he had Athena on his side and a device which could mimic the card. It has been some time since he had pocketed someone, and he didn’t want to get back into the swing of things right here. 

_ Perhaps he should try getting some sweets Reinhard carried around all the time when he was back from this mission. Just for practice, of course. _

He made it through the unsettling concrete corridor leading to the server room. Why did people always need to put in such a flair for the dramatic? A simple room at the end of the stairs would have sufficed. It wasn’t as they had used the space for any extra security measurements, as people were confident in the vault door keeping people out. The same door Jesse only needed to fidget a minute before in unease till it magically opened for him. Athena was simply the best. 

As he entered the ice cold room, he shivered, but hopefully he would be out of here before he would freeze anything off and the cold temperature also made it less likely for someone to be on watch here. 

It took some time till he found a server with an access port to which he could add the hard drive to so Athena could take the data they needed. He kept shivering as he stood around rubbing his arms through the thin shirt.

“Fucking cold.”

“You're doing good.”

Shimada’s voice shocked him as it was neither a snarl nor mission related. Jesse turned it over and over in his head but didn’t find any evil intent behind the words. It was a genuine compliment. _ What the fuck. Was hell freezing over because it sure felt that way with how cold it was. _

There was a soft ping in his ear and a message on the display of his mask informing him that the download was done. Now all that was left to do was get out here undetected. 

It shouldn’t be that hard. Just getting out the same way he got in.

Shimada was a constant presence in his ear whispering, and Jesse had to admit it was significantly easier to avoid guards and security cameras when he relied on the other man. 

_ Damn, _ he hated his guts but he couldn’t deny that the man was useful and accomplished in the field. Which was the worst because they could have made a great team if it wasn’t for the others' unpleasant personality.

_ Fucking hell. _

“I passed the last camera. Get out of here and randevou in 10.”

“Roger that.”

Crawling through the vents wasn’t any less claustrophobic the second time than it was the first, but Jesse managed and was promptly met by rain which messed up his vision, normal and night, and made everything slippery. The only good thing was that it also limited the vision of the guards patrolling the perimeter and made escape easier. 

Still, he could have done without as he really didn’t fancy catching a cold. But so far everything had run smoothly, and they were nearly out. If a bit of rain was the worst he had to put up with, he could handle it.

**“GET AWAY!”**

He flinched at the loud voice in his ear, and his heart rate sped up. If Shimada broke cover like that something bad must have happened.

“What?”

“Talon. It’s an ambush they know we are here. Make your way to the dropship on foot and deliver the data.”

Fuck. FUCK  **FUCK**

“What about you?”

“I will manage.”

“Bullshit.”

“You hate my fucking guts, anyway. Why aren’t you just happy I will be gone.”

And with this their line of communication broke for the first time this night, as Hanzo must have deactivated or broken his com. _ Shit. _

The guy was right Jesse should be glad that he wouldn’t have to deal with him anymore and it was what he deserved for the thing he had done to Genji still it didn’t feel right.

It took a moment to identify the feeling chumming in his gut and fuck it was the same guilt he felt when he was confronted with Morrisons state after the prank. Like he did something wrong and came to regret his decision.

_ Fucking hell.  _

He was already into the woods and on his way to the dropship. Shimada had told him to go. He would either be fine and make it back himself, or he would face the consequences of his decision. They all knew of the risk of getting involved with Overwatch. They all were aware of their own mortality, and there was no reason to risk the mission for a single person because the mission always came first.

Jesse spun around chunks of wet grass flying everywhere as his boots left deep imprints and he sprinted back into the direction of the back of the facility where Hanzo should have had his escape route. He was still far enough away to not draw attention from the facility when he heard fighting.

With a well-trained move, he slit the long knife free from its sheet on his hips as he continued to storm forward, the shouts getting louder and louder as did the gunfire. But that was good. As long as there was fighting, Hanzo was still holding on.

As he flew past a line of trees, he ran straight into the back of an unsuspecting Talon agent and before the other man could react or Jesse come up with a plan of how to deal with the situation, his high-strung brain flew straight back into the mindset of his Blackwatch days. 

Before he knew it, the knife was hilt deep in the neck of the Talon operative perfectly slipping between helmet and neck guard and hot, warm blood was coating his gloves making the grip on the hilt slippery as he pulled out the knife and smoothly moved it into an attack position again. The body hadn’t even hit the ground when Jesse had already wrestled the rifle out of the corpse's fingers and sprinted forward.

The next person spun around in shock, weapon raised and directed at Jesse but instead of stopping or hiding Jesse pushed forward throwing the guy off and before the Talon agent found his composure Jesse was already pushing the barrel to the side and the shot flew wide hitting another agent which had stepped out of the trees and positioned himself behind Jesse. 

Jesse's abrupt stop sprayed clods of earth everywhere, and he could see the fear in the man's eyes as he pressed his weapon to his chin and fired.

With this, his way was finally free again.

And then he finally saw Hanzo. Leaning heavily against a tree, the fabric of his trousers discolored with blood making him unable to climb up and hide in the trees. In his shaking hands a stolen rifle directed at one of the 8 Talon agents, which all had their weapons turned against him. But even with all of this, Hanzo was still standing, still fighting, his lips warped in a snarl of pure fury and his eyes blazing through the glossiness of pain. 

_ He was beautiful. _

_ Unearthly. _

Jesse hadn’t believed in God since his mom had been taken from him way too early, but he believed if there was a god of war he would look exactly like that. Powerful, dangerous and fucking gorgeous.

As if he could take on the world and tear it down with his rage.

_ ‘Oh shit ooh sit oh sit,’ _ And then Jesse’s rational brain kicked in screaming at him to get a fucking move on and take care of the attackers because there was no way Hanzo could face all of them in his state.

**“RYŪ GA WAGA TEKI WO KURAU”**

The loud and powerful cry made Jesse flinch and flung himself and the man he had jumped on, onto the ground waiting for something extraordinary to happen as the man in the front of the group of Talon soldiers dropped. 

For a moment everything was silent except the gurgling of the man drowning in his own blood in Jesse’s arms.

Time stood still. 

Shots and weapons fired as everything exploded into chaos.

There was no time to check on Hanzo as Jesse fought and fought and fought. To survive, to win, to kill. One enemy after another fell.

And as he spun around searching for the next, he was only met with bodies littering Hanzo’s feet. 

He moved towards the man to do...something  _ (hug him, scream at him, worship the ground below his feet, leave him behind, punch him). _

Hanzo tilted forward.

His knees hit the earth.

He swayed.

He collapsed.

Jesse dashed forward, too slow to catch him but fast enough to roll him over and press a shaking hand against the wound in Hanzo's gut.

**Fuck fuck fuck** . They were flying solo. THEY WERE FLYING SOLO.

No communication to base, no one to call for help. Just him, Hanzo, the blood and dozens of bodies.

He grabbed Hanzo’s hands and pressed them on the wound in his place before he started running again, searching the bodies around them for any form of field med kid or something else he could use. He was in luck. One enemy had been a medic. The small kit wouldn’t be enough to heal Hanzo, but combined with the biotic field he himself and Hanzo carried hopefully enough to keep the man alive till they made it to the extraction point.

He returned to Hanzo's side, struggling to get the chest armor off with his trembling fingers, noticing the 4 bullets stuck in the material. If it wasn’t for the armor, Hanzo wouldn’t be breathing right now. He threw the thing away and used his knife to get rid of the shirt to look at the damage.

It was bad.

Terrible.

Jesse left the bullet inside, unsure if it stopped some bleeding and doubtful about his surgery skills.

He threw the first biotic field down and put some hasty stitches in, nothing pretty but they just had to hold, as he put bandages over the wound.

“I-I...don’t...don’t understand.”

“No talking, just focus on staying awake.”

“They...they didn’t come.”

“What?”

“My dragons.”

Right there it clicked for Jesse as he was pressing bloody bandages against Hanzo’s middle, his arms covered in the man's blood.

**Dragons.**

The scream had been a call to summon dragons. 

It made sense now. Hanzo’s comment about him never meaning to unleash the dragons against Genji. Jesse had thought it was a manner of speech, a slip of the tongue. But the man had been serious. He had sent his dragons after Genji and they had ripped his brother apart.

Just as he had now called upon them to save him in the situation. Had called his dragons, but they didn’t come.

And it was Jesse’s fault.

Because he had been stupid and ignorant. Had insulted Hanzo by inquiring about the very tool used to kill his brother, and had punished the man for the deserved rage.

But it was even worse because Jesse knew he was the reason the dragons didn’t appear. Because he had taken them from Hanzo and made them his. Gave them names, cuddled with them, and mouthed off about the very man they were sworn to protect until they didn’t. Until their master called upon them in his desperation and they kept silence. 

_ God, he had been stupid. _

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” hot tears streamed down Jesse’s cheeks as he repeated the words over and over again like a mantra like it would change anything. Would lessen the guild 

_ It didn’t. _

“Just hang on. I will get you to Angela. Okay? Hang on. You can make it. Genji is waiting for you. He loves you. Please, just hang on. Oh god. I’m so sorry.”

He lifted the smaller man into his arms, careful to not rip the stitches and start moving towards the bikes.

Hanzo had to make it. He couldn’t die. Jesse had way too much to make up for.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this even it it was a bit dramatic.
> 
> I would be really grateful about some critic for the stealth sequence and the fight as I'm still trying to figur out how to write them.


	7. Day ??

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally resolving the cliffhanger fromt he last chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for not posting in so long. Life has kept me busy and motivation has been low. But my new years resulution was to write more...let's see how long I can keep that up.

Before him laid the vast open fields, wild and untamed, overgrown with thorns, undergrowth and bushes. But amid this unruly nature laid flowers of the most gorgeous kind protected by mother earth herself.

Which made collecting them quite difficult, but that didn’t stop Jesse from trying just that. He maneuvered forward, careful to not destroy too much of the lush grass under his boots, as he ducked past some nettles only for some thorns to catch in his Serape. It would be easier if he had left the fabric with his motorbike, parked on the small dirt road but he much preferred to scratch up the fabric than his arms. He pulled the thorns out, thankful for the leather glove on his hands as his metal prosthetic was occupied with holding back a thick branch from snapping in his face.

Finally, past the worst of the brushwood he crouched down stunned by the beauty of the wild flowers growing all around him in all colors and shapes. He brushed over the bud of one and down the stalk.

They were perfect.

Naturally, going to the next store in the city and just buying a bouquet would have been so much easier than driving all the way out and collecting some wildflowers himself but it would feel lazy. And Jesse wanted it to mean something. If not for  _ him  _ then to Jesse himself.

Even if he knew little about flowers besides that red roses stood for love and therefore couldn’t send an obscure message in the language of flowers, this felt better than asking some random shop assistant for advice.

He took out his swiss army knife out of his pocket and started cutting the flowers he thought looked the prettiest, collecting a wide variety of different blooms. 

He placed them in his Serap and made his way back to the bike, the nettle burns were worth it for the flowers staying safe.

  
  


~*~

  
  


He found his way through the stones easily enough, having gone this way time and time again. And where at first there was resistance and unease halting his step so he didn’t even make it to his goal the first couple of months now there was just a sense of comfort in coming back here.

He made his way further into the older part of the graveyard and stopped in front of a weathered unremarkable stone. Jesse felt bad for not coming herein such a long time and letting it get into this state as he pushed off old leaves, plucked the weed, and scrubbed off dirt with the help of some water from a bottle he brought. Only then did he place the wildflowers in a robust vase he had bought specially for this and filled it with the rest of the water from the bottle.

Satisfied with it no longer looking abandoned he sat down in front of the grave and got comfortable for the long conversation he was about to have.

“Hello, it’s me again. Well obviously. It is always me. But don’t take it to heart, okay? They still care for you even if they don’t visit anymore. I’m sorry for being absence for so long, life has kept me and the rest busy, not that that is an excuse. I should have made time, but it has been hard, getting them to accept my need to still come here has been hard. But I missed you. God, I missed you.”

At this words Jesse curled up and had to rub his eyes as he felt tears well up in them even after all this time. The absence of the other man still left a gap in his chest that had gotten shallower with time and people by his side but never disappeared.

“I know I should accept the reality, move on and all the jazz but I just..I..I can’t. It worries them but I need this...need you. God, I wish you were still here. I could really need you right now with everything. Morrison isn’t that much of an ass anymore, at least most of the time but still he isn’t you, you know? And I could really need you with everything going on with Talon. But you probably know about all of that. You are smart after all. Smarter than me.”

Now he was really crying, soft sobs he tried to hold back but still came out. He muffled it into his hands, trying to get back some composure and continue talking but couldn’t. Whenever he opened his mouth to speak he gasped for air but even with all the breaths he took he didn’t seem to get enough air. It had been such a long time since he had gotten this worked up as he normally didn’t have the luxury to let his walls down like this. Nowhere but here.

“I..I messed up..messed up re-real bad...I-I don’t...don’t think I can fix it...I was su-...such a-an i-idiot. Y-You wo-wou...would slap me. Sorry. God. I-I’m so sorry. I-I was angry be-because of Ge-Genji. I lash-lashed out. H-Hurt...wi-without reason...the blood.”

Jesse starred down on his hands. They were clean, rubbed raw in fact. That didn’t stop him from still having the phantom of sticky blood on them no matter how much he scrubbed them.

“Th-they say...say it-its Ta-talons fault..bu-but it-it's mine. I-I stopped the-the dr-dragons be...because I...I was se-sel...selfish. I-I’m re...resp...responsible.”

With these words Jesse had to stop again and stuff his fist into his mouth and bite down till he tasted metal to silence the anguish wail.

“Ha-hanzo...so..so sorry. I-I’m...sorry. I ca-can’t make u-up for it. He-he m-must hate me. I-I ca-can’t face h-him. God...D-dad. What...what do I do?”

He didn’t expect an answer from the grave in front of him. Not back when he still thought the man he once saw as a father figure was buried in the ground in front of him. And he wouldn’t start now that he had found out that the man was alive and had betrayed them to switch sides. 

After Morrison and Ana came back had revealed Reaper's true identity he had been angry, confused, shocked but most of all sad. People said you only appreciate what you had when it is taken from you. And so Jesse had only learned to appreciate Gabriel for what he was after the man was supposedly dead. The adult in his life, the supervision, the guiding hand had turned into a father.  **His father** . It didn’t matter that they didn’t share a single drop of blood. Gabe was his father like his mom was his mother, and the bastard that had given his DNA for Jesse’s creation had no say in it.

After all who had taught Jesse how to shave? Held him after he had a nightmare about his first kill? Always took his side? Protected him from everyone wanting to throw him into prison? Punched Morrison as he denied his promotion to second in command? Acted annoyed but was actually endeared to his Cowboy getup and designed a uniform fit for Blackwatch?

Even if Jesse had grown out of the foster system before Gabe could place his signature on those adoption papers he was and would always be his son and nothing would change that.

_ Which was why finding out the man had switched sides hurt so much more than his dead ever could?  _ And Jesse was ashamed to say it wasn’t because the man had lost his moral compass he always admired or was now one of the bad people. No, it was because he was still out there alive and kicking and had left Jesse alone to fend for himself when he had promised to always be there for him no matter what.

And Jesse couldn’t help but think it was his fault. He had left first after all. That he had just needed time and had planned to come back had even tried his damndest to stay in contact even if that didn’t work out didn’t matter. He had left. But even before when Blackwatch was falling apart he hadn’t been good enough. 

Not good enough to consult him, to share plans, to talk about his concerns with Talon to keep at his side.

_Why hadn’t Gabe taken me with him? Why hadn't he come for me all the time I was running from the law like a rat? Why hadn't he asked me to join him in Talon?_ _Why was I never good enough for him or anyone? I failed Gabe back then, and I failed Hanzo now._

Jesse was just meant to fail people and ultimately be left behind all alone and unloved. Because no matter how much he tried he couldn’t shake off the gutter he had crawled up from.

Then abruptly, the communicator in his pocket came to life. He fumbled to take it out with his shaking fingers, the trembling only getting worse when he saw who exactly was calling. He rubbed his eyes and tried to steady his breathing but had no illusions he could hide his mental state from Angela even if it was only a voice call. Still ignoring her would only make her worry even more and she would send the cavalry after him to check in and he really didn’t want to be found here and have them try to  _ ‘help’  _ him cope with Gabe’s betrayal again. One time had given him enough emotional trauma already, and he didn’t think he had the willpower to stop himself from scratching Morrison’s eyes out if the man dared to insult Gabe again by pushing the blame for the swiss headquarter on him.

“Hallo Angela.”

There was a pregnant pause and he could lively imagine her frown as she clicked her pen debating if she should try to ask about what was going on with him. She made the smart choice and continued with the original purpose of her call so Jesse didn’t hang up on her.

“Jesse, I'm here to inform you that Agent Shimada finally woke up from the artificial coma. He is stable, his memories are intact except some dizziness at the end, but that can be expected from blood loss. All in all, he is fine and with a lot of rest and some physical therapy he will return to the field.”

Jesse breathed a sigh of relief. Even if Angela had reassured everyone after two days of touch and go that Hanzo was in no danger of dying anymore, Jesse had still had his doubts after having to restart the man’s heart on his way back to headquarters twice. 

Now there was another worry nagging at him, as big as the fear for the man’s life.  _ How could he face him?  _

_ Well, he couldn’t. _ That was why he was here, crying to the empty grave of his father and not at the man's bedside with the rest of the agents. He would just steer clear of the medical wing for now and leave it to future Jesse.

“He asked for you multiple times now. So stop whatever wallowing you are doing and get your ass back here. I really can’t deal with him trying to get out of bed or working himself up anymore. Understand Agent McCree?”

He hated when she did that. Used that tone with him. He wasn’t able to say no to her.

“Okay,” he said faintly. Looks like there was no running for him, but he had to get up and face the consequences of his actions.

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to get Gabe in there somehow.


	8. Night 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jesse has to face Hanzo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter in hope to finishing this soon wihtout delaying it further and further. I grow more and more lazy with the formatting. Please someone explain to me how to make my story look good.

Jesse jacked up his bike in the hanger of the Gibraltar base next to the car the team used for supply runs. The space usually occupied by their main dropship was empty. Morrison must still be one his quest to sniff out every nest of Talon agents he could find and make them pay for what the organisation did to Hanzo. You could badmouth the man all you want but there was no doubt about how deeply he cared about what was left of Overwatch.

The second significantly smaller plane was still in the hanger's part deemed as workshops for repairs as it had been since Genji and Zenyatta had returned in a frenzy when they heard what happened to Hanzo. Jesse had only caught a short glimpse of the panicked Shimada as he sprinted past him to reach his brother only to be stopped kicking and screaming by Reinhard from entering the operation room. 

He hadn’t been able to endure more of his best friend’s crying and sorrow knowing that he was responsible and had fled the hallways where everyone had gathered to wait for news on Hanzo’s condition in shame. He hadn’t gone back ever since and tried to avoid anyone like the plague and it had worked so far as they had given him his space. 

But now there was no more running, no more hiding as he made his way through the base deliberately slow with heavy steps like going to his own execution. And in a way he was. After facing Hanzo and admitting his sins the life he had led so far would be over, with no chance to get back to it. He would be lucky if he got the chance to make up for his sins and redeem himself once more instead of being kicked out of Overwatch.  _ But how many more chances would he demand just to throw them away?  _ To spit them back into the faces of the people offering them like he did to Gabe after Deadlock. 

_ Maybe it would have been better for everyone if the man had stopped trying the first time Jesse shot down the Blackwatch deal. _ Or when he ignored orders, got into fistfights, screamed, threw tantrums or lashed out. It would have spared Reyes and everyone else so much heartache including Hanzo. But Gabe never did. He might get angry, loud and threatening but he never gave up on Jesse and waited patiently for him to come around. A father's love. Truly.

Which was why Jesse had to do the right thing now, face Hanzo and apologize before leaving Overwatch. That was the least he could do. From the start he had known that him returning to Overwatch with the bounty on his head and a reputation to match would only cause trouble but he had followed the call, anyway. The temptation and need to belong somewhere again, to feel at home too big. But this wasn't his place anymore. Not without Gabe desperately struggling to make room for him.

With his resolutions clear he entered the med bay. Angela looked at him with a raised eyebrow taking in the heavy bags under his eyes and hollow cheeks with a disapproving sigh. But she stayed silent and only gave him a pat on the back as she opened the door to the bedroom adjusting to the med bay. Jesse hesitated for a second but couldn’t put it off any longer with Angela’s sharp eyes on him and gave a soft knock before stepping in. 

Jesse closed the door behind him, unwilling to let her in on his shame and face her scolding afterward. Befitting for a coward like him. He looked at the floor for a few more uncomfortable seconds before finally he felt like going out of his skin with nerves if he put it off any longer and his eyes flickered up, taking in Hanzo. The man was sitting up and leaning against the headboard of the bed, looking worlds better from the last time Jesse saw him. 

There were white bandages poking through his loose hospital gown. He had lost some weight and was still pale, but his eyes were open and focused and he was taking in Jesse with hyper fixation. And he was alone. No Genji hovering at his brother's site, no Reinhard trying to play awkward nursemaid and no Lucio lifting the mood with some cherry tunes. 

It was just Hanzo and him. 

Jesse didn’t know if that made the situation better or worse. More awkward for sure as he cleared his throat, searching for the courage to finally speak.

“Thank you, Mccree.”

Hanzo speaking up so unexpectedly made Jesse flinch, and he looked at the other man in shock hearing the word but not really finding the context for them. Visiting after running away for so long wasn’t really something Hanzo should thank him for. More like Jesse should apologize for postponing all the time.

“W-what?”

“Thank you for saving my life. I wouldn’t have made it if you hadn’t come back for me and I was told that you had to restart my heart multiple times on the way to Angela. So thank you very much for saving me. You didn’t have to do that, in fact I especially told you not to. And given our...strained history...you could have prioritised the mission, but you didn’t, so thank you.”

Jesse gaped at him like a fish on dry land, trying to wrap his mind about what was happening and how he landed in this twilight zone. He opened his mouth to answer multiple times but he just couldn’t find the words and closed it again, growing more and more frustrated as words failed him time and time again. What came out was only a softly gasped no.

“..no? Agent Mccree? I don’t understand. What do you mean with no? Mccree? MCCREE?  **JESSE!”**

Jesse twitched at the scream of his name, blinked through the blurriness and looked at Hanzo’s panicked face and at the arms desperately reaching out towards him with no chance and bridging the distance between Jesse and the bed. There was way too much movement for a man held together by stitches, and Jesse stepped forward to help Hanzo before the man destroyed Angela’s work. But he only stumbled and had to grab the wall to stay upward as his knees threatened to give out. 

_ Oh, that was why the Shimada had such a panicked look on his face. _

He blinked again to get rid of the blurriness that had to be tears, and sure enough he could feel wetness rolling down his cheeks.

What a mess he was. Instead of facing this like a man and apologizing, he started crying before even getting the words out.  _ How pathetic. _

“Breath! You have to breathe. Whatever it is, it’s okay. Just calm down.”

“I-it is...is not okay. I’m sorry. I’m so s-sorry. I...it is my fault. Everything's my fault. I was stupid,” he gasped to get some air so his words wouldn’t be slurred together in sobs but recognizable. He had to do this and do it right. Hanzo deserved that much.

“I was angry because everyone threatened me like a child, because no one cared about me for all the years I was on the run. And there was you getting the attention and respect I wanted, and I let my anger out on you using Genji as a pretext. I was unfair and childish and I’m sorry. I shouldn't have said the things to you and I know there is no way you could ever forgive me so I won’t ask for it but I will do anything to at least minder the burden I caused you. I will pack my things and go. Leave you to reunite with your brother in peace.”

“No. **NO!** Don’t go. You have been through a lot. I understand. It is okay. I haven’t been acting that civilized myself. We had a rough start, but I would like to leave that behind us and start over again. Become comrades and even friends.”

“I can’t!”

“Why? It’s okay. I’m not angry.”

**“I ALMOST KILLED YOU!”**

“Excuse me?”

“I-I...It is...I’m the reason..the dragon they...they didn’t come because of  **ME!** ”

“You know about the dragons?”

“I do. I didn’t know they were yours. I swear. They found me and I...they made me happy. And I...I traduced you and then you called and they didn’t come a-and...and it is my fault. It is because of my I-I..without me you would have been fine.”

Hanzo looked at him wide eyed

“They searched you out.”

“Yeah.”

“And you accepted them. Every part of them. No matter how scary they are.”

“Obviously,” Jesse sniffed miserably. 

The expression on Hanzo’s face was unreadable as he beaconed Jesse to come closer to his bedside, and Jesse could not resist the pull. If Hanzo wanted to punch him in the stomach again, he would more than deserve it. He just hoped the man wouldn’t rip any of Angela's precise stitches in the progress.

When he was finally standing beside the bed, he got a closer look at the man’s hair that was for once let down from its usual ponytail to frame Hanzo’s face in soft strands. It made Hanzo look softer, even more beautiful. And Jesse felt even more inadequate with his dirty clothes from sitting in front of the grave, his scratched up arms, sweat soaked hair, red-rimmed eyes and tear tracks on his face. 

But before he could step back like a mutt with its tail between its legs, Hanzo’s hand snatched out grasping Jesse’s wrist in a death-grip. His weak legs didn’t stand a chance when Hanzo tucked on his arm making him fall forward so he kneed on the bed awkwardly trying to get back his balance. Before he could fall an arm snuck around his back and on his shoulder, guiding him down sideways till he was leaning against the bed’s headboard next to Hanzo close enough to count the other man’s long eyelashes.

Flustered and embarrassed, Jesse tried to lean back as they hadn’t really been on the friendship level where you could casually cuddle up with each other without it getting weird. But the arm still around his back stopped him and didn’t let up even as Jesse pushed against it. So with nowhere else to run and Hanzo insisted, Jesse turned until he got a bit more comfortable and settled down. 

“Do you know why the dragons searched you out?”

Jesse just shrugged.

“I was occupying their favorite spot?”

That made Hanzo snore and his entire face lit up in happiness in a way Jesse had never seen before, never thought possible before witnessing it. It made Jesse’s stomach tingle, and he had the stupid notion to wanting to see it again.

“Century old, noble dragon spirits and you were just occupying their spot.”

“Well, yeah. They are kinda like cats, right? Stubborn, hotheaded but soft as a marshmallow on the inside.”

This got Jesse another smile of amusement and something else.. maybe endearment? Hanzo must really like his dragons if they could put such an emotion on the usual so stoic face. The thought that he had tried so carelessly to take something so important from Hanzo was like a heavy weight on Jesse’s chest. He wiggled uncomfortably, trying to get some distance, but the surrounding arm just tightened and brought him even closer to Hanzo’s side. 

“You are for sure the first person who sees two gigantic dragons able to tear people apart and compare them to the common house cat.”

“If the shoe fits. They are kinda cuddly after all.”

At this words Hanzo’s amused smile fell and Jesse ducked his head in shame. He shouldn’t have said that. It was one thing admitting to trying to steal someone's spiritual dragons, but another to tell that man straight to the face he had snuggled said dragons.

“I’m sorry...I-I sho-”

“You cuddled with them.”

Jesse was just about to apologize again when he heard the rumbling coming from Hanzo’s chest, reminding him of the one the dragons did when he scratched them behind the ears. 

“A-Are you purring?”

“Having a spirit dragon is not like having a pet, nor like having a partner. They are anchored to your soul, your very being. You are not the same, but neither are you different and one can easily influence the other. Especially when one party is as young and inexperienced with emotion as me.”

“What?”

“When I said they searched you out, I mean they searched **you** out specifically and in my stead because I was too busy with my own insecurities and denial to do it myself. They cuddled you because I wanted to cuddle you, they took your side in this because I wanted to take your side and they punished me for my actions against you because I deserved it. Nothing of this was anything but a fault of my own. If I had been open about my feelings from the start, they wouldn’t have had to sneak behind me back to fill the ache inside me.”

“Feelings?”

At this question Hanzo started looking kinda uncomfortable, and Jesse could feel tears welling up inside him. There were a lot of different feelings and many of them far from being good. Envy, indifference, dislike, scorn, jealousy, hate. So even if Hanzo had feelings for him, that didn't mean it had to be any good. Rather, the opposite with how the man had acted around Jesse when he first came to Overwatch. Not that Jesse had deserved anything else.  _ So yeah, _ it was easy to say that Jesse didn't really want to know what kind of feeling it was that Hanzo was talking about. Ignorance could be a blessing. He rather wanted to fool himself into thinking Hanzo didn't despise him.

A hand in his hair, softly cradling through his locks, and scratching his scalp broke him out of his spiral of despair and he stiffened up in surprise before the soothing feeling of being cuddled relaxed him until he melted against Hanzo's side going completely boneless.

"Genji, he talked, a lot, as he was trying to convince me to come with him to Overwatch. He talked about you as well. In fact, he enjoyed the tales about the cowboy running with Blackwatch the most and didn't tire of them. How stupid your outfit looked, how funny you were and how brave, what are good friend you are and how much you helped him come to terms with his new self. He even talked about the bad things, the fights, the screaming, the moody periods and the lashing out. I liked that as well. It made you look more approachable...less of a myth and more like an actual person."

Jesse took a sharp breath. He knew how close he and Genji had been back in the days of Blackwatch, which was why he had been so hurt when his friend left to find himself and didn't contact him in all the years. To hear now that Genji never really forgot about him and moved on but remembered their time together meant a lot. That he even openly spoke about it to his brother, when after all the years of separation there was so much else to talk about, made Jesse feel such a tender love towards his best friend.

"All the tales made me feel like I knew you despite never actually meeting you. It made me feel close to you in a way I hadn't been to anyone else in years, in a way I wished I could be with Genji again. It helped me reconnect with my brother on some level and made me curious enough to give into coming to Overwatch."

It shocked Jesse to the core to know that he had meant so much to the man without even knowing it. Without even doing anything.  **He wasn't like that.** Wasn't someone able to help others. He was the mess that needed help and second chances. Not someone to rely on.

"When we arrived here, I was confused on how to act. I wanted to be close to you, to experience everything Genji told me about, but I was also afraid. Afraid you would find the interest of a stranger repelling, that you wouldn't like the person I was, that you would reject me and I would lose the best thing I had. The thing that kept me going. So I kept my distance from you. A stupid thing to do. I know that now. I had gotten too good over the years to deny myself what I wanted, and so I withdrew every time you reached out and tried to make friends with me. And then at one point it was too much and..."

"..I lashed out at you."

Hanzo winced.

"Yeah. But like I said, it wasn't your fault but mine. I pushed you away too many times, so it was inevitable for you to get feet up with me and I'm sorry for it."

"Still, I shouldn't have lashed out like that. You deserve to be here. Genji loves having you back. It was just unfair. I'm sorry."

"It is fine. I won't forgive you because there is nothing to forgive. Both of us didn't know how to handle the situation, and it turned into a mess with no one at fault. Just terrible circumstances leading to a worse situation."

"So..you don't...hate me?"

" **HATE YOU?!** God no. I could never hate you."

"Even if I stole your dragons and almost got you killed?"

"Even then. Far from it."

"Your sure?"

"I'm absolutely sure. I don't hate you. I thought I clarified that it’s the absolute opposite. I love you. I adore you just like my dragons so clearly do, want to always stay close to you, hold you, protect you, make you smile. My feelings haven't changed since the first time I laid eyes on you. In fact, they have only grown stronger as I discovered more facets of you. I dunno if after everything that happened my advances are still welcomed, but if you would allow it, I would wish to keep loving you."

_ Love... _

Hanzo loved him. Had loved him all the time. Just like Wayne and Eastwood did. Loved him enough to rip himself apart over it. Literally.

It confused Jesse. What do you say to that? How do you react when the person you thought hated you loved you like that, so unexpectedly?

"I-I...I"

"It is okay. I can completely understand if you don't return my feelings and want me to back off. The last thing I want is to make you feel uncomfortable."

Jesse swallowed, trying to clear his head and get orders in his thoughts. He didn't know what to say to the sudden confession. But uncomfortable? No, it didn't make him uncomfortable. Quite the opposite. It made him feel warm and giddy. Cherished like he had at the dragon’s side. He liked it.

"I dunno if I feel the same...it is sudden. And I know little about you yet...but...but it doesn't make me uncomfortable. I..I know I'm asking a lot...but wou-would you give me some time? To get to know you? Like Wayne and Eastwood?"

"Wayne and Eastwood?"

There was a big blush on Jesse's face as he cursed himself once more for blurting words out without thinking and embarrassing himself in the progress.

"The dragons. I didn't know what to call them so...Wayne and Eastwood. Bu-but now that you can tell me their actual names, I will call them that."

"...you named my century old, Japanese dragons after cowboys, didn't you?"

The sheepish nod of Jesse made Hanzo laugh out loud this time in delight and the purring started again, showing Hanzo’s happiness. It was a relief for Jesse that he hadn’t overstepped with his forwardness but instead brought Hanzo joy.

“I can’t believe how much of a dork you are. That is so adorable. Let's keep the names. I have the feeling they prefer them over the Shimada clan given royal ones, anyway.”

Hanzo yawned and maneuvered to lie down, and Jesse followed easily enough after some encouraging tucks until they laid side by side with Jesse's face pressed against Hanzo's chest.

"Can start the whole getting to know each other thing tomorrow? I'm tired and you too look like you could really use some sleep. If that is okay, I mean. You, sleeping here. If you rather want your own quarters, I can totally understand."

"Here is perfect."

Jessy murmured, already blinking heavy as Hanzo's calm breathing and the strong protective arms threatened to lure him to sleep. _ Yes, it was perfect just like this _ . 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well I hope you liked the big conclusion.


	9. Day 64

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue as the story finally comes to a close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it took way longer than I thought it would but I finally made it through and finished it.

Waking up. It wasn’t as instantly and abruptly as it used to be. No longer was Jesse startled awake by the softest of sounds outside his room and ended up crouched on the floor with his gun pointed at the source of the noise. 

Instead, it was a slow, comfortable drift to wakefulness. Starting with becoming aware of the cozy heat surrounding him, the softness of the pillow his head rested on and how the mattress under him had the perfect balance of sucking him in but giving support. Even the sun peaking through the half-closed blinds only felt warm and welcoming instead of urging him out of bed to get moving.

He uncurled his legs from the fetus position they had been stuck in and the arm covering his waist tensed up to hold him close but instead of getting up Jesse just snuggled back into the broad chest behind him. After they took a second to adjust to the new position, a thumb started caressing Jesse’s stomach soon followed by soft kisses pressed to his neck and bare shoulders. Jesse hummed happily as he enjoyed the attention. It wasn’t rushed, nor was it sexual. Just nice. Lovingly. 

_ And wasn’t that a weird feeling?  _ Being loved. Unconditionally and endless just for existing, for being himself. Getting something so valuable and special without having to fight blood, tooth and nails for it still stumped Jesse sometimes, made him question things, but Hanzo always gave reassurance pretty quickly.

“Morning,” Jesse rasped, voice still rough from sleep before turning his head and pressing a kiss to whatever part of Hanzo’s face he could reach. It turned out to be the chin as the beard tickled his lips. But that was fine because Hanzo found Jesse’s lips and pressed featherlight kisses to them.

“Morning to you too.”

“Can we just stay in bed all day?”

Hanzo chuckled and continued to kiss a path over Jesse’s face over his cheek, nose, brown up to his forehead.

“We could, but in an hour you will complain about being hungry and needing to pee and we will get up and I will make you the Japanese style breakfast you enjoyed so much the last time.”

Jesse hummed happily just remembering it.  _ God,  _ Hanzo was the best thing that had ever happened to him. 

Hanzo snorted at the face he must have made at the mentioning of food and patted the stomach that his hand was still resting on teasingly. _ And yes _ , Jesse had gained some weight now that he wasn’t constantly on the run and had someone that made sure he was fed but it wasn’t something that bothered him. Neither did it Hanzo - if the constant petting, kisses and blown raspberries were an indicator.

“How dare you?! My stomach is  **a work of art** ,” he complained in an over dramatic voice as he nipped Hanzo’s chin in revenge but was way too content to pull away and dislocate Hanzo’s hand to underline the act.

A playful growl from Hanzo and Jesse found himself on his back, pressed into the cushions by Hanzo’s weight.

“Hello there,” he drawled up at the other man, smirking at the suggestive position they ended up in. He didn’t mind this development at all as he put his hands on Hanzo’s chest and caressed the skin there. But his opinion changed quickly as Hanzo’s hands stroke forward like a snake and found the weak spot on Jesse’s waist and mercilessly tickled him. 

“ **No** . Ah. Stop. Have pityyyyaaaaaaahahahahaaa.”

He tried to give Hanzo a glare through the tears that streamed down his face but failed miserably as giggles shocked his body.

“I will have my revenge-aaaaa eeeee hehehehehehehe.”

Jesse resisted and squirmed, tried to turn and buck the other man off, but freeing oneself from a trained assassin's pin was quite the fruitless endeavor. So he changed tactics and attempted to calm down and suppress the wild giggles in hope the other man would lose interest. But Hanzo just variate between barely touching the sensitive skin and scratching with his nails and there was no way to hold in the breathless laughs that ended up in gasps for air, as he writhed in the others' grasp.

Suddenly there was a loud howl and the weight of Hanzo just vanished in a blue blur followed by a loud thump and loud Japanese curses Jesse had picked up within his first month of dating Hanzo.

Only after he got his breathing back under control while ignoring the rising volume of angry Japanese, Jesse crawled to the edge of the bed and peeked down to see Hanzo on the floor pinned by Wayne.

In the tender beginning of their relationships when everything was still raw from the failed mission, he would have freaked out seeing Hanzo crushed like this, expecting to have the other man slip through his fingers again. Now though he just smiles as Wayne playfully nipped at Hanzo’s hair and trenched him in slobber. 

“Stop laughing and get him off me!  **Bad Dragon** ,” the man shrieked which made Jesse laugh out loud. Seeing that there wouldn’t be any help from his boyfriend and the age old beast wouldn’t stop behaving like an overexcited puppy anytime soon, Hanzo surrendered to his fade and went limp under Wayne and started petting the scales his pinned arm could reach.

“Aww don’t be like this, darling. He just wants to cuddle. It’s kinda sweet.”

“I wanna see how you would like it if it were your ribs being crushed.”

The hair on Jesse’s neck rose in sudden alarm and he flung himself forward, off the bed and into a flying roll but it was too late.

He landed on the ground with a loud off, losing all the air in his lungs as he felt hot breathing on his back and a curious snot nuzzling into his neck playfully accompanied by a wet tongue. 

“E-east..wood..do-down.”

Normally he was all in for cuddling with his boyfriend’s wonderful dragons. Especially since they threw heat like a furnace and you could stay outside all night snuggled against them. But in his overeagerness Eastwood hadn’t been as careful as Wayne with his fragile human. While Hanzo was effectively pinned, most of the dragon's weight wasn’t on the man himself as Wayne just kept comfortable body contact. Jesse on the other hand felt like his chest was being crushed and he could only take shallow breaths.

“That’s Karma.”

“h-help...Ha-hanny. pl...please.”

There was a very put upon sign, a token of protest but Hanzo gave in.

“East get off. I still need the idiot.”

The dragon’s whine turned from protesting to worried and apologizing very quickly when he got off and Jesse gasped for air with a pained moan.

“You saved my life.”

Hanzo just rolled his eyes at his boyfriends antics as he wiggled out from under his dragon and offered his hand to help Jesse up which he gladly took. His legs were unsteady after being crushed but that only gave him an excuse to lean into Hanzo and showering him with affection.

“Yeah yeah. Put this on.”

Hanzo swatted him away when he had enough of Jesse pressing featherlight kisses at his neck and threw a shirt at him. Shrugging it on Jesse noticed pleasantly that it was his butter-soft ‘The (l)only cowboy in the room shirt’. One of his absolute favorites and it matched really well with the ‘Save a horse ride a cowboy’ shirt Hanzo had stolen from him to sleep in last evening. 

With both of them dressed in pyjamas and no fear of flashing someone with their nacked glory they wandered out of the room and in the kitchen's direction. The dragons, curious as they were, followed them, opting to take a smaller form in the hallway.

Jesse had lost his shit when the gigantic man-eating beast had turned into fluffy noodles for the first time. It had happened like this:

_ “No, you can’t come with me. Bad dragons. No.  _ **_NO_ ** _. You are too big.” _

_ Jesse gestured wildly with his arms trying to hold both dragons back which were standing on their usual rooftop and very determined to follow him down the small hatch. He could easily understand their wish to not be left alone and the clinginess and worried after what had happened to Hanzo. But still. They were way too big and would break the whole tower apart if they tried to get in. And even if they climbed down the outside, the base itself and especially the hallways were way too small to let them through to the med bay where Hanzo still rested.  _

_ So as much as Jesse wanted to take them with him and let them check in on their master he couldn’t. Being unable to see Hanzo only agitated the dragons now that Jesse had taken the last four hours clearing up the misunderstanding between all of them. _

_ After spending the last two days following Hanzo’s confession by the man's side much to Mercy’s and the team’s confusion the man had begged him to check in on his dragons because he couldn’t feel them as they were still blocking their connection. Jesse had happily obliged, glad he could do something for the man beside foot rubs and soft kisses.  _

_ The dragons had welcomed him by nearly mowing him over whining in worry and curling around him, unwilling to let him go. And they had listened. Listened as Jesse explained everything and begged them to reconnect with Hanzo because he couldn’t live with himself knowing he had destroyed something so special for the man he loved.  _

_ Which had resulted in the dragons panicking over their hurt master which led to them now trying to squeeze through the maintenance hatch but not even getting their head through because of the horns.  _

_ It would be funny to see such regal creatures poke their snot through the hole and bump against the rim if Jesse wasn’t so worried they would tear the building apart in their frenzy. _

_ “You will not fit. Please stay here. I will come back and once Hanzo is healthy enough, we will both visit you. But for now please stay here.” _

_ There were displeased huffs and growling but at least they stopped trying to get through and just stared down at him and Jesse thought he had gotten this one. That was until loud hissing and bone breaking cracking sounds filled the air accompanied by thick smoke filling the air and obscuring his view. Jesse coughed, waving a hand in front of his face in a futile attempt to get rid of the smoke. When it finally lifted he just saw two small blurs darting in his direction before he was hit in the chest, stumbling back under the impact.  _

_ He grabbed wildly at whatever was attacking him, dragging it back from where it was climbing up his clothes to his neck and stared at it. It looked like a ferret. If ferrets were blue, adored by scales and with a tuft of fur on the head and horns...so nothing like a ferret at all. _

_ “ _ **_WHAAA_ ** _!” _

_ When it finally clicked what he held there, he threw the dragon away in a panic, instantly regretting and storming after it. But instead of the splash on the ground he feared the dragon used the wall as springboard and jumped to the other wall to gain momentum and landed right back in his arm with a displeasure hiss.  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ Wayne then. _

_ Which meant the one crawling up his back to hide under his Serape had to be Eastwood.  _

_ He lifted Wayne up to his face looking at the now considerably smaller creature. He looked wrong. Jesse shocked him a bit and Wayne growled but swung like a noodle which had been boiled for too long.  _

_ Oh god. What if his throw damaged him after all? Why were they even so small and squishy in the first place? Had he broken Hanzo’s dragons? He had broken the dragons. _

_ Hanzo would be angry.  _ **_HANZO_ ** _! He must know how to fix this. _

_ Jesse only took a moment to place Wayne around his neck and made sure Eastwood was secure under his Serape before jumping down the leader and running through the base. _

_ “Hey Jesse, my man, I didn’t-” _

_ He didn’t stop and poor Lucio nearly ended up slammed in a wall as he stepped in Jesse’s way. Thank god for Reinhard and his great reflexes. _

_ “Sorry. Emergency.” _

_ He slithered past the door of Hanzo’s sickroom as he failed to come to a stop and stumbled back crashing into the doorframe as he fumbled with the knob. _

_ “Jesse your back,” even if Hanzo was shocked by Jesse suddenly appearing like this he had a smile on his face seeing the other man, “how did it-” _

_ “I BROKE YOUR DRAGONS.” _

_ Hanzo just blinked at him in confusion. _

_ “Excuse me.” _

_ Unable to explain the situation he grabbed a very displeased Wayne from his neck, earning a few scratches and trusted him in Hanzo’s face.  _

_ The man blinked a few times from the noodle like dragon to Jesse and back before realisation lighted up his face. _

_ He started laughing. Hard. And didn’t stop. At one point Mercy ran in quickly followed by Genji alarmed by the heart monitor going crazy only to find Hanzo laughing with tears running down his face nearly hyperventilating because he couldn’t breathe. _

_ Mercy nearly gutted Jesse for making Hanzo rip his stitches like that and didn’t stop cursing as she put them back in when Hanzo had finally calmed down. Genji on the other hand just looked at Hanzo with such softness, wonder and love that Jesse was about to leave and let the brothers have their intimate moment before Genji turned to him. The man had such a proud expression on his face and before he knew it Jesse had a cyborg ninja in his arms mumbling thanks into his ears while near tears. It was a turbulent afternoon.  _

And even now after having witnessed the dragon change so often that Jesse didn’t bat an eye at it anymore he was still embarrassed by the entire event and could feel Hanzo’s amused gaze on him. 

“Yeah yeah laugh it up. I’m sorry I didn’t expect two giant ass dragons to turn fun-size suddenly.”

“I apologize. You know I don’t hold it against you it is just...you thought you broke them.”

“Excuse me. Like you have a leg to stand on at all. I saw the tears in your eyes when I showed you the pictures of them in cowboy hats. In fact, I know you stole my com and copied it to yours to use as your screensaver. You know most couples have cute selfies or pictures of their significant other like this,” he shoved his com in Hanzo’s face showing him a picture of Hanzo peacefully curled up on a sofa, asleep, “and not pictures of their pets slash kids.”

“When did you take that!”

“Two days ago. The Clint Eastwood marathon. You fell asleep halfway through.”

“Delete it!”

“What no. Why?”

Jesse stepped back holding his com as far away from Hanzo’s grabbing hands as he could to protect his treasure. The Hanzo in the picture was just too cute.

“I look undignified. Now delete it.”

“No, darling you look literally perfect it-”

“Trouble in paradise, luvs?”

Jesse looked at Tracer who blinked from the kitchen table to his side to look at the picture and cooed.

“Aww how adorable.”

“I’m not adorable. If anything, it is Mccree that-”

“Oh, we are back to Mccree now. I see how it is, sweetheart.”

“Please shut up, it is way too early to hear my brother and best friend flirt.”

Hanzo just huffed in found annoyance at his brother.

“Must I remind you of the times when I found you in way more compromising situations way earlier in the day? With a lot less clothing if I remember correctly.”

“AHH SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP. That was ages ago.”

“Mhh your sure? I saw the way the waitress looked at you last time we were in town I’m sure if you asked she wouldn’t say no.”

“NOOO.”

“Now, now darling, stop tormenting your brother like that. He is a changed man and above fooling around,” Jesse got a grateful look from Genji as he jumped to his aid to everyone's surprise, “plus we all know he is pining for a certain omnic. So tell me Genji, do Shambali monks practice abstinence? Or will you get lucky once you get your head out of your ass and ask him out?”

There were a few seconds of stunned silence before Genji groaned something incomprehensible but probably cursed Jesse into next Sunday before letting his head drop on the table with a thump. Tracer crackled in amusement and Hanzo... Hanzo tried to hold himself back and keep up his image but he couldn't help himself as he broke out in a loud laugh.

“What have we here?”

Everybody looked at Ana as she entered the room and wandered over to the tea cupboard with an ever-growing selection since Hanzo joined. Jesse stayed quiet like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar not knowing how Ana would react to him teasing a teammate. Too long had they been apart before she joined the recall.

  
“Jesse was grilling Genji about when he planned to finally ask Zenyatta out.”

Tracer that traitor. This means war. Next training session she would suffer for this.

“Oh did he now,” she looked sharply at Jesse and he shrunk down even further trying to hide behind the much smaller Hanzo.

“A most interesting question indeed. So Genji what's your answer?”

Genji sputtered, coughing and fumbling for words seeing as everyone was ganging up on him. 

“Ana why are you doing this to meeee?”   
  


“I wanna know that all my little sheep are happy and taken care of. And if even this rascal,” she pointed at Jesse, “settled down so can you.”

“Well that is just rude. I tell you I’m a delight.”

“You are a stupid cowman that acts like a five-year-old most of the time and I can only stand you because I love you.”

“And you are an arrogant asshole but I love you too, darling.”

“Gross. No kissing in front of me, brother.”

They kissed just to spite Genji till Jesse’s protesting stomach disturbed them.

“Breakfast?”

“Breakfast.”

Hanzo opened the fridge as Jesse got another pot of coffee going and made some tea for Hanzo.

“Breakfast has to wait, we have an impromptu mission. Get dressed and come to the hanger. Rotations are on board so we will eat while debriefing. You have 10 minutes, “and Morrison one again took the fun out of anything. Jesse signed looking sadly at the ingredients Hanzo was putting back in the fridge. Bye-bye delicious breakfast and hello tasteless nutrition bars. 

He shuffled over and pressed his face in Hanzo’s neck cuddling the man from behind.

“Why is it it is always our free day that gets disturbed? I tell you Morrison is getting me back for the prank I played.”

Hanzo just hummed neither agreeing nor trying to calm him down but knowing that Jesse just needed to vent his frustration.

They made it to the dropship exactly 10 minutes later even if Jesse dragged his legs and complained. The entire crew was inside all anxious about what could need s many people.

Soldier 76 stepped forward once they were in the air.

“I know all of you have questions so I will make this short. Both Amélie Lacroix and Gabriel Reyes are alive and have been taken by Talon under the moniker of Widowmaker and Reaper.”   
  


There were shocked gasps and shouts. Jesse could just sit there frozen. Gabe was alive. Had been alive all this time and never contacted him... Gabe had tried to kill him.

An arm around his shoulder pressed him against a wide chest and he curled against Hanzo soaking in the comfort the other man gave. He wanted to cry but he couldn’t. He just felt numb and empty. And so exhausted. All he wanted was to go back to his comfortable bed with Hanzo and forgot this ever happened. Pretend this wasn’t real.

“It will be okay. I got you. We can get through this together.”

Jesse nodded, sitting back up again but taking hold of Hanzo’s hand to reassure himself. He was glad Morrion, who no doubt noticed his little breakdown, had waited for him to collect himself before continuing.

“We just got information from an inside source we have in Talon that O'Deorain vanished. Talon lost an enormous asset with no one nearly as capable to replace her. Which gives us options. Especially with Reyes and Lacroix.”

There was confused murmuring. Sure Moira being out of the picture meant Talon was weakened but there wasn’t really a connection between her and the two Talon agents who were in the field while she did the lab work for the organisation.

“From the very beginning Lacroix has been controlled by Talon through the suppression of her emotion. A painful progress which needs refreshing regularly especially when confronted with situations where stress and emotion should run high. Now that O’Deorain isn’t performing these refreshments herself anymore their effectiveness is dwindling and there are first signs of Lacroix’s emotion resurfacing.”

This couldn’t be.  _ How hadn’t they noticed anything once they had rescued her from Talon?  _ They had just padded themselves on the back and sent her back home so Talon could activate her and command her back into a world of pain.

“Reyes has been experimented on by O'Deorain before the incident at Switz HQ. She used that as a base to reanimate him after the incident and had some sort of failsafe she used to force him to obey if he wanted to continue living. Our contact didn’t share what the failsafe was, but that it is neutralized now and Reaper is waiting for a chance to tear Talon down.”

No. Jefe. He had suffered all this time, and Jesse had done nothing to help him. Hadn’t known. He had failed the man. If only he had stayed with Blackwatch in the first place instead of running, then he would have noticed how twisted Moira was and could have stepped in and stopped her. It was his fault.

“But no matter the past we can’t change it. We can just offer our help now, free them from Talon, and over them a safe place and home if they wish. If we burn Talon down and spit on it s ashes in the process even better. I say let’s get our family back.”

“YES.”

The screams of agreement were ear-shattering as everyone put everything else behind them and just got ready to fight for the ones they had lost. Talon didn’t know what was coming for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for reading this fanfic and being so patient with my slow uploads.

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to leave a like or a comment. I'm always open for critic and feedback.


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